Goad2 Feb 2005

This is really good. I liked the first two stanzas, particularly the second. I didn't like so much the meta-commentary of the last 7 lines. If you are serious about this one, try rewriting the last half a few times and see if you can stay in the image more and let the image make the commentary. (it's the old show not tell. First two stanzas are Very Good showing. Last two are more telling)