darren676 Oct 2002

Thanks for your comments.

Ummm I hope if I make a couple of suggestions you won't be offended (I fully admit I know nothing about poetry) But if you changed the line ending "horror first began" to "horror did begin" you get a closer match in rhyme.
Also the last line should end in the word 'sin' ... something about the night bringing sin maybe
Just a couple of thoughts ( :