Re: Deck's Tavern by Ombre	3-Aug-02/9:39 PM
vivid. could be compressed a little to lose a couple of ornamental paragraphs, also watch out for word reppitition. for instance. hell.stared. i think that if you found a couple of more compelling words involving some of these characters. ears honed. eyes void of spirit.cock eye laughs for the fanged vagina. her nail aren't red man their crimson, not pointy all the time, but sometimes staleto tipped. well anyway i liked it. give you a 8. hardboiled.entrails.gouda cheese.herring moon pie. good bye!
Re: I Hate You by mytenderrage	3-Aug-02/6:07 PM
highschool? coffee? austin?????? here quick cure for both the raven and the chalupa. tequila, kurt vonnegut. descriptive life experiences. name a character! fuck anything, because this piece is beyond aroma therapy..i ..mean it's fine for an envelope band a stamp. mail it to the cockstretcher if you like. it would work if you told the reader interesting tid bits to keep ,them going, give them a reason to love you and hate him. this is not your journal it is a forum, so fight with wit or suck moose tit(you'll be fine water off the back of the swallow, duck, pigeon,whatever) use detail, power words an unusual stucture a metaphor a simile an oxymoron.ahhhh.drink.smoke. eat with the pigs. learn how they speak then show them your hoof and they will listen, but you must speak pig. vine.swine toast. ufo
Re: Bottom on the heath by ==Doylum	3-Aug-02/5:45 PM
that's where he put's the erased comments. the bottom of the heath. DA is a commenting burying basard, he makes it look like i'm dingy and talking to myself cuz the dark one removes his from inbetween. let us break wet wind in his study. not that he has ever studied anything other than little buy bottoms and dr. suess, upside down and upon his potty chair. poo on you two
Re: Bottom on the heath by ==Doylum	1-Aug-02/8:33 PM
Fuckkkkkklkkkk.,.i totally fumbled plains of africa part 7 ..it erased fuckkkkk.. it was great...it was perfect..it had taripin turtles and the cross eyed heynna and everything fuckkkkkk.and heron and fish and beak shit fuck now i gotta go play piano, but me memory is sharp and when i come back you are getting it!just for you ..you are gonna luv it so i'll leave you with part 1 and 2 in the meantime(1) the rhino shits.its early in the morning as the sun begins to strike the hard green dew soaked plains under Killimanjaro. the hulking beast turns and hesitantly sniffs it's piled shit. the turdpack steams.a gazelle leaps quietly through the high grass. the rhino turns and lumbers off. his horn is up. his "hoof" trot high. the rhino squats low in the shade of the cypress..the lion pride stares and licks lips. rhino falls asleep with shit on heel. fly on horn tip.tail whips slow. o
Re: Morphine Cherries of August by horus8	1-Aug-02/5:26 PM
listen douche fuck..it happened to be an accident..the cops have sealed the file..it was a suicide okay..not a homocide.. big difference.trailer.stilts.foodstamp.cars littering the front yard got you down call 1-800-red-neck to learn the art of the "slip and fall" accident. or "how to burn down your trailer and live to collect the money" both excellent reads you fuck key word hygene.listerine.kerosene.vaseline
Re: Things Are Going to be Different Next Year by JanieDoe	1-Aug-02/5:06 PM
fictional. as is the space between your ears. but if there were such places i'm sure that they would have a strict dress code and caste system not to mention big bull dykes waiting at the door to push you back into the streets and behind a freshly painted dumpster..to train your carpet. to wrinkle your skirt. but for a mere 6,000 dollars a year you can be shuttled in from any location and pampered like a princess. Who knows..take the idea and build one in your back yard..and don't worry i found part 5 at about 12:45 today.it's all good .thanks.toodle lous a
Re: My purple headed womb ferret by ==Doylum	1-Aug-02/4:01 PM
my yellow submarine gives your purple ferret das' boot'..naw that's a funny little poem..i lift my leg and pee on your toe it gets into your hangnail and kills spores..you can thank me later
Re: Thinkin! by KezzY20	1-Aug-02/3:56 PM
soft supple dreamy everything DA hates this one is okay though it's honest.l
Re: BURNHAM BEECHES by longships	1-Aug-02/3:26 PM
you meant 'steel' right..right, don't steal my coasters or make me smelt steel..see how easy that is. bueno!t
Re: BURNHAM BEECHES by longships	1-Aug-02/3:21 PM
well yeah but..to mold the boat out of steel and fiberglass also takes trees. for framing and modeling prior to pouring, and the process of melting metals also couln't be done without trees. <now don't get me wrong i'm not saying do a madagascar> or anything, but i'm also not condoning killing beatifull old trees. i'm just saying the lesser of the two evils is better then both evils. que no??
Re: Internet Prisoner by avwiz71	1-Aug-02/2:52 PM
take your glasses off..crack your fingers..make a little lunch.go outside. get a lap top. BUT QUIT E-MAILING MY GIRLFRIEND SMUTZZ. or you will recieve not "the plains of africa" but the "gates into the gobi desert" capeeshT
Re: BURNHAM BEECHES by longships	1-Aug-02/2:48 PM
Without the tree? how can we build the long-ship? h
Re: I DON'T SMILE ANYMORE by longships	1-Aug-02/2:45 PM
horus8 golden cue-tio award recipient. congrats..this is a moving verse like meditations in green, or the quiet american. you really took me there. iam humbled your 'hoof' led a good life it will leave it's imprint deep in the soilk
Re: THE PAIN OF LOVING by longships	1-Aug-02/2:34 PM
that is a longship. very empathetic and unified. best wishes. "the falconed lad" 10t
Re: Sunday night is Curry night by ==Doylum	1-Aug-02/2:32 PM
hystericaln
Re: A Glitter ring trip to Fance (Whats on your Picobird) by ==Doylum	1-Aug-02/2:20 PM
i smoked on that flight too..they were waiting in paris with guns and the bastille..i said the portugese chick made me do it..cuz she did..she made me touch her with my mind somewhere high over the atlantic and steal her away to the planes lavatory for a quick smoke suck. clench.kite.now.hope.
Re: recent submissions by <~>	1-Aug-02/2:17 PM
unripe plums was why piggy blew the conch in the "lord of the flies" and why my ass is a toilet paper shredder. bed wetter.low.gode.jete.beaver.
Re: wednesday night after church by unknown	1-Aug-02/1:53 PM
Mr. getty..i've been waiting. we have all fixed our haikus for you..and you deserve part(6) plains of africa part (6) grunt..warm..surge. the hyenna was born crosseyed and bow legged with a hard splash post his mother's squat and giggle.he was the last of six and the runt. tired and unable to laugh..mother beds down with pups to rest up for the sun and another day of survival. she turns to clean her swollen bitch cunt and eat the after birth.her pups whine in dissaproval having been dislodged from tits. the runt rolls from mother's milk and warmth into a bone ridden corner of the den.but his nose is sharp for milk and he crawls his bow-legged crosseyed tiny ass back to a tit for the night. the moon is high full and shadow cratered tonight on the plains of africa..under a cypress tree..a vulture hops around the bleaching carcass of a dead rhino with a shit stain on its back "hoof"
Re: in a parking lot by <~>	1-Aug-02/1:21 PM
found it! plains of africa part (5) the young cheetah siblings peered out from their hideaway. they were waitimg for mother to appear out of the horizon. eager for her distinct shoulder blades jutting up into the setting sun. they were hungry and thirsty, but they knew better not to move without mother. but where could she be? it had been two days by the older brother's calculations. while cleaning his sister he smells a familiar tummy rumbling scent. turning his head towards the water hole he notices a vulture half submerged and dying in the sitting water. he decides to risk it. he springs then sprints towards the dying morsel, but the vulture still barely aware. lifts itself away to safety. the cheetah cub knowing it's meal is now a memory in his dehydrated nose opts to take a quick drink. one two three laps of moisture then back to his sister. finishing he turns to see a pack of wild dogs coming to drink and size him up. he's fast enough to get back to his sister, but that would be the end of them both. he sits licking the last living drops of water clear from his lips before they tear him appart. his sister looks on too parched to cry, too smart to meowl. across the water hole under a shady cypress. she notices a male rhino sniffing at the horn and bones of his stripped mate. the right back hoof has a dark stain upon it. her brother now torn to pieces died quietly and bravely. she's still hungry. the sun has fallen below the tall grass. the sky burns unaware and majesticly. mother is no were to be found. lovely poem smart and original! 
Re: Through the eyes of life by Angel_of_fait	1-Aug-02/1:05 PM
can someone please help me find my edition of plains of africa part 5, i forgot to copy and paste last night so i'm looking for it. it's in somebody's comment line from last night late. it has the cheetah siblings in it..its very dear to me so..i would appreciate it.cuz i'm putting all of the episodes together today..to see how it looks .thanks..oh. nice poem..err.thanksg