on Unholy War by marvelis
7 Mar 2003, 3:31 PM
Lots of cliches. Lots of them.
on Keanu Vs The mystery of life by Shardik
7 Mar 2003, 2:31 PM
Pretty pointless and off the mark for a haiku. Sorry.
on The Blooding by Mr Pig
7 Mar 2003, 2:45 PM
Some good wording, but it suffers a loss of imagery toward the end and the metaphor you implement becomes weak and tired. You might cut down on the heady language and quit telling so much. At least that is what I would do. but it is still decent in some regards.
on if only you could read my mind love by sk8boardandpoems
7 Mar 2003, 2:33 PM
This sounds like you are actually attempting to write a childish poem.
on some deleted poem
7 Mar 2003, 2:30 PM
This is funny in away I don't think you mean it to be. Way overdramatic!
on The deafening silence in the world or something by Bachus
7 Mar 2003, 2:50 PM
It is pretty bad when you have to end you work with a quote from a song.
on some deleted poem
7 Mar 2003, 2:48 PM
The images don't make alot of sense. It sounds more like you threw a bunch of words together that sound cool and called it finished.
on Something for Lynn by Jeremi B. Handrinos
7 Mar 2003, 10:33 AM
almost there. still a little young.
on Love spank by Shardik
7 Mar 2003, 11:44 AM
funny and completely worthless at the same time.