poemranker ::Work by poetandknowit

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Free verse № 11418

Work

Member since 2002 · Posted 26 Aug 2002 · 18 comments

She eases me to her breasts as a mother would a wounded child. This has been one of those days and it's about work, always about being employed and that slip that comes around when your time runs out and the last paycheck that dwindles more each day because of the phone service and support the daughter and former wife need to get by, and about the change gathered from the penny jar and coat pockets just to buy cigarettes and have bus money to travel twelve blocks on a freezing night to eat a warm meal from a woman who disappeared four months prior with a man driving a red truck, after a year or so of things not working out. Against her the hollow resonation of something long faded, a body whose rhythmic dance once swayed easy with my touch, even when the rent was late and we sat nights laughing crazy in the dark. Then it was about work and being under qualified, always about that fifty cent annual raise and skipping time on the coffee break, and it's about leaving this woman just after midnight when the last whistle shocks the cold with a metallic moan.

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mean 6.17 weighted 6.17 rank 1040 views 223 View voting details →

66 votes so far. Yours would make 67.66 votes so far

A favorite of god'swife.

18 comments

[10] god'swife 26-Aug-02/2:35 PM Reply
The working class hero. My very favorite. I'm in love with the sound of it, and I think it's so easy to relate to. Lines 10 & 11 have some kind of grammatical confusion to them but I can't pin it down.Swayed easy with my touch... Sat nights laughing crazy in the dark..... 10
[9] Bachus 26-Aug-02/3:29 PM Reply
that's fucking blue collar brilliance p&k, you get the Bacchian swagger of the week recipe here comes the love baby
(Bachus's favorite soup)
Kotosoupa Avgolemono:
(Greek traditional Chicken and rice soup)
What you need:
1 stewing chicken, 6 c.broth, 1 c. rice, 3 eggs, seperated, juice of one lemon(my favorite aspect, <stoner short cut add lemon juice to campel's chicken noodle w/rice>), salt & pepper to taste.
Boil chicken until cooked. remove chicken and let cool. boil 6 cups of broth and add one cup of rice. add salt & p to taste. When rice is cooked, lower heat to simmer. put 3 egg whites in mixing bowl and beat until stiff. then add the yolks, then add juice of one lemon slowly; beating well. then add the yolks, then add juice of one lemon slowly; beating well. then add the broth, a littla at a time, beating well, until most of the broth is used. Pour this mixture back into pot, stirring well. Pieces of chicken may now be added to soup if desired.

"That all-softening overpowering knell, the tocsin of the soul-the dinner bell." Lord Byron (enjoy the recipe friend, and the poem was great and bountiful, like this soup! 9/10!

t
[9] <~> 27-Aug-02/6:00 AM Reply
i aged while reading this. this poem has a keen edge.
[10] evergreen 27-Aug-02/6:55 PM Reply
one of the best things on this site. 11.
[9] Venus 27-Aug-02/10:51 PM Reply
This is one tasty ditty; a pleasure to read. I appreciate the stream of consciousness style sans meandering. Blue and tight! 9/10
[9] dragonfly 5-Sep-02/9:13 PM Reply
"the last paycheck
that dwindles more each day
because of the phone service
and support the daughter and
former wife need to get by." I think it's brilliant. It has a great rhythm! Never thought the woes of paying bills could sound so purty. =)
[10] alexander 9-Sep-02/5:09 AM Reply
Ok truce, this was seriously good. You are quite right, my efforts are pathetic compared to others here and this one of yours. I will try to redeem myself.-10/10
[9] pink_punk_kisses87 12-Sep-02/5:38 PM Reply
very good, i really enjoyed reading it.
[8] deleted user 13-Sep-02/9:31 AM Reply
You understand the pain of the day, the pleasure of the night. Its only friday and I can feel the monday morning blues
[4] nocturnalism 19-Sep-02/2:05 AM Reply
all right i guess not my style tho needs more abstract i think
[n/a] wunboi 20-Sep-02/4:26 AM Reply
Mate .....Its not a poem,but a piece of prose .You have arranged lines & sreamed thoughts to fit a form. Ideas images are not encouraged. It has plenty of potential but no challenge.
[n/a] poetandknowit › wunboi 20-Sep-02/8:22 AM Reply
Mate...My favorite aspect of this site is when fellow writers come on board and say something that cleary is poetry actually isn't poetry. Like you have all the strict definitions crumbled up in your pocket. Must we continue to make statements that show our preposterous knowledge of poetry? If you need me to explain why this is poetry to you I will be more than happy too.
[10] limonade 4-Oct-02/8:36 PM Reply
I keep getting stuck on the "and, and, and." Is this deliberate? The rhythm is very forced. Still, I love it after "Against her the hollow resonation..." It seems to find the flow here that it was lacking in the first part. The cadence of it all brings to my mind the image of a train roaring through the night, rattling on its tracks ("hollow resonation", "rhythmic dance", "swayed easy", "skipping", and, of course, "the last whistle." Those last two lines are beautiful, pure art. I could give you a 20 for them.
[4] strider1 9-Oct-02/10:08 AM Reply
Rambling and innocuous, in love with himself or herself and smug.
[n/a] horus8 › strider1 27-Nov-02/9:52 PM Reply
aren't all of our left feet sometimes.
[0] ErgoErgun 27-Nov-02/9:34 PM Reply
Change your name to IFUCKINGSUCK. This reads like a pathetic proxy for a 2pac rap, mixed with some piss and shit you found lying in your stack of unpublished poems. If you pride yourself on this consider going through puberty, growing a pair, then writing about something that isn't bromidic. Oh, and get rid of the shit you use for fountain pens and the stale piss you use for ink. Thanks bitch,
Love ErgoErgun
[9] Nicholas Monson 3-Dec-02/1:22 PM Reply
Deeply evoking. Great.
[n/a] horus8 11-Dec-02/5:23 PM Reply
round and round, where we stop nobody knows.oh yeah... at a brief confessional, but look again is it really? yes. but notice how well it's blended into the magic plum sauce.o