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The Big Stupid Dink :) :)

Member since 2005 · Posted 23 Aug 2005 · 10 comments

Burnt toast and uncooked eggs, its been a week, since I shaved my legs. The sun shines brightly through the pouring rain, he left me here, to feel nothing but pain. Two little children, a sofa, a table, and a cat, I caught him red handed, and that was that. He took the micro-wave and my "How Too" cook books, thumbed through my albums, and stole Dr. Hook. What a friggin' jerk the father of my kids, I keep asking myself, What the hell I did. He took my dart board and the damn darts too, I hope lightning stirkes his arse, and frys him in his shoes. But, that would be terrible, Don't you all think, If my kids lost their father, the big stupid dink! They'll see for themselves, unfortunately. So, I thank God in heaven, That they will always have me.

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10 comments

[n/a] INTRANSIT 23-Aug-05/1:51 PM Reply

mostly normal stuff. Stealing Dr. Hook is worth goin' after him for.

[n/a] Bethy › INTRANSIT 23-Aug-05/5:20 PM Reply

Thank you INTRANSIT...gosh darn right...lol...:) Bethy

[n/a] ALChemy 23-Aug-05/1:53 PM Reply

Kind of an Erma Bombeck rant. Dink will get a laugh no matter where you use it.
Most men will turn Big Dink into a complement. It's just the way our egos work.

He didn't deserve a poem anyway.

[n/a] Bethy › ALChemy 23-Aug-05/5:25 PM Reply

Awww Thanks AL...and your right...I love Erma's words...my friends and I call HIM... "Needle Dick the Bug Fucker"...but it was hard to fit it into my poem...Whaaaa...! :) Bethy hehheehe ha!

[7] Dovina 23-Aug-05/3:50 PM Reply

When you say ":) :)" in the title, I wonder if it's tongue-in-cheek. As I read, I think not. Maybe :-(

And "Stupid" means something like "Arogant"

Shave your legs, girl, put on a dress, and have a drink. That's what I do.

[n/a] Bethy › Dovina 23-Aug-05/5:30 PM Reply

Arogant Dink...oh I like that, Dovina...lol...
O Kee Doe Kee...smoooth legs,a dress, and a drink...hmmmmm maybe I'll bump into Mr.Lucky...lol :) Bethy

Oh Yeah...:) :)...my way of saying..HA HA...Cheers!!

[9] zodiac 24-Aug-05/5:13 AM Reply

Drop the comma after week and it's the best first verse I've seen lately. Stanza 3's good too. The rest could use work. Here are some directions to take it:

1) What can a poem this long talk about besides the guy was a jerk, at least the kids have great me? Possibilities: the real emotion of a guy leaving, even if he wasn't that great; the empty side of the bed; small bits of human contact.

2) I'd like to have the following commandment for all poetry engraved: Thou shalt not sound reproachless. Thou shalt at least leave some tension surrounding whether the narrator's really a great guy (or girl) or not. Also whether or not the narrator's really on the right track or not. Thou shalt at least leave some room for doubt, lest lightning striketh your unhumble head. Like in the one I just posted: The guy's got some sensitivity problems, leaving his house and fucking women like that. And he might not even be so right about things. Maybe he is, but there's a give-and-take, see what I mean?

-9 for the first and third stanzas-

[n/a] Bethy › zodiac 25-Aug-05/3:01 PM Reply

Thank you soooo much Zodiac...I see exactly what you mean...hence the new poem...your advice open something up inside me...stick to the topic and feel it...good words of wisdom...:) Bethy

[8] woodstock20000 24-Aug-05/10:56 AM Reply

Made me smile. Thank you much.

[n/a] Bethy › woodstock20000 24-Aug-05/3:35 PM Reply

Thankyou...and smiles are good...:) Bethy