poemranker ::caught amist by LaasChijld

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Villanelle № 138767

caught amist

Member since 2006 · Posted 11 Feb 2006 · Edited 11 Feb 2006 · 2 comments

caught amist I wondered of into the mist, freezing in hale gives chill cooled it down with a hiss. walking circles in the abyss Brought me down, tired until I wondered off into the mist. I flicked and gave it a twist, Took a breath & stayed still cooled it down with a hiss. Loaded it up, put in my fist Then against lips to fulfill, I wondered off into the mist. filled to the brim to assist, A flick, with a hit to kill cooled it down with a hiss. Illness calls I cannot resist A Kiss to momentarily to feel I wondered off into the mist cooled it down with a hiss.

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mean 6.67 weighted 5.45 rank 2950 views 136 View voting details →

6 votes so far. Yours would make 7.6 votes so far

2 comments

[7] zodiac 12-Feb-06/12:49 PM Reply
You mean "wandered". Like, "I wandered lonely as a cloud".
[7] Ranger 13-Feb-06/4:33 PM Reply
Second line of the last stanza doesn't make sense, a couple of spelling errors but other than that a very respectable effort.