poemranker ::Guarded Fool by drnick

DetailsThe poem, its numbers, and the conversation.

Free verse № 151185

Guarded Fool

Member since 2005 · Posted 24 Mar 2007 · 10 comments

Inside your simple system I wish to be imprisoned, with rules and regulations I will grow. Containment cannot break me, but I hope that it will make me a cold and lonely soldier strongly sewed. Within my strengthened skin, I will hide and not let in any single person near or far. While in this solemn state, I dream to have what it takes to feel and be alive without guard.

Rate it

0 is the worst, 10 the best. Pick a number, add a comment if you like, then send it. Keys: 0–9 pick, Enter sends.

mean 6.60 weighted 5.19 rank 4669 views 180 View voting details →

5 votes so far. Yours would make 6.5 votes so far

10 comments

[8] Dovina 24-Mar-07/4:33 PM Reply
Either join the army or a woman. The last two lines suggest the latter, and so do I.
[7] richa › Dovina 25-Mar-07/12:14 PM Reply
Join a woman. How about superglue her ear to her toe.
[n/a] drnick › richa 29-Mar-07/3:12 PM Reply
How about I staple it instead with my .40?
[n/a] drnick › Dovina 29-Mar-07/3:12 PM Reply
Women don't like me.
[9] Skamper 24-Mar-07/8:39 PM Reply
Love this! So stringent, seems to hold form of a rhyme scheme then loses it, excellently played out, not only in words but in the way the mind tries to be bound by form, only to lose it and let it flow...make sense? I usually don't...
[n/a] drnick › Skamper 29-Mar-07/3:14 PM Reply
Thanks, I get what you're saying but that wasn't intentional.
[7] richa 25-Mar-07/12:18 PM Reply
This must be about children. You teach them rules and in psychoguff terms they internalise those rules and then when the rules are removed they grow into upstanding chaps. The poem is rubbish if my theory is incorrect.
[n/a] drnick › richa 29-Mar-07/3:15 PM Reply
I'm glad you held hope that a poem of mine was not rubbish, but perhaps this is because you don't know me. This poem is, as all of mine are, up for the reader to decide. It's whatever you think it's about.
[9] Ranger 25-Mar-07/12:53 PM Reply
Like it. Reminds me of a passage from Slaughterhouse 5 - "How nice - to feel nothing, and still get full credit for being alive".
[n/a] drnick › Ranger 29-Mar-07/3:16 PM Reply
I'm glad I could remind you of anything to do with slaughter. That is my purpose.