Care Bears in Bondage

One odd, disturbing Saturday morning The parents' eyes still tired and weary The ratings for the Care Bears Had been dismal, some say dreary. But the network had revamped the show In the hopes of a new sensation Their desperate plan: Care Bears 2 The Next Generation. In addition to old regulars Like Sunshine Bear and Friendship Bear Spreading such heartfelt care The concerned parents were horrified At the introduction of Bondage Bear! With whips and chains And red fish-nettings She gave new meaning To "furry little teddies". Instead of spreading Care Bear cheer By example and passive contrition She bound and gagged unhappy souls And beat them into submission. Luring little Heart Bear in With cookies and with milk She taught him that "the ties that bind" Are really made with silk. This wicked installment had no lesson Nor any moral to preach, For at the end of the show, each little bear Was at the end of a very short leash. And as public outrage reached a fever pitch That such smut they dared to air, The scenes from next week's episode Announced the coming of...Bazooka Bear! 11/95