persistant doubt

Member since 2002 · Posted 13 Jul 2002 · 3 comments

tonight i feel the familiar touch of loneliness it comes to me like an old friend wanting redemption but i have none to give it's been so long since i've lived i miss the hunger the longing and the knowledge that it was not in vain i was never full my heart is pulled on a chain one end connected to me the other connected to you the more i try to break it the stronger it gets nothing here on earth is stronger than the bond i formed with you rain on me your love pour on me your pain just get through to me somehow my soul, i'll let you claim again we were married ages ago instead of a ring i wear the scars you gave me like glass you cut through me shatter me again to leave me wondering: does doubt ever cloud your vision?

Rate it

0 is the worst, 10 the best. Pick a number, add a comment if you like, then send it. Keys: 0–9 pick, Enter sends.

mean 6.00 weighted 5.50 rank 2696 views 151 View voting details →

9 votes so far. Yours would make 10.9 votes so far

3 comments

[5] deleted user 13-Jul-02/2:15 PM Reply

The poem needs something to unify it -- right now it feels like a wondering list of loneliness.

[8] itchiwitch 13-Jul-02/4:06 PM Reply

You have captured loneliness and betrayal as it is in its moment of manifestation. The question in your last line leaves an opening for hope. Don't let the sadness stay with you much longer. Its time to find joy in your life again with someone new.

[2] ==Doylum 15-Aug-02/9:37 AM Reply

Yes i doubt that this type of peom will ever cease to be created and posted on this site. Daily.