poemranker ::Unseen Death by Fire_is_cool

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Free verse № 97031

Unseen Death

Member since 2004 · Posted 14 Apr 2004 · Edited 19 Oct 2004 · 3 comments

As she waves goodbye, To her parents, She closes the door, Her house is, Empty and dark, All of a sudden she, Hears music, Coming from her room, She slowly creeps up, The staris, She walks down, The long dark hallway, And opens the door, Ever so slowly And sees nothing, Then she sees a dark, Figure move closer to her, Then she feels, A stabbing pain, As the scissors, Are inserted through, Her throat, As the killer, Slowly twists the scissors, Around in a circle, And then yanked them out, The blood slowly drips, Down the wall, As her cold dead body, Falls to the floor, The music plays on, Forever.

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mean 6.25 weighted 5.15 rank 5279 views 177 View voting details →

4 votes so far. Yours would make 5.4 votes so far

3 comments

[n/a] Sasha 14-Apr-04/7:19 PM Reply
Show, don't tell
[5] Dovina 19-Oct-04/2:18 PM Reply
A short story with too many "then"s and commas, Not a poem.
[10] Sheeva 15-May-09/10:01 AM Reply
Very Good i'd give it 20
It's a lil' broken up if you know wat i mean