SupremeDreamer8 Feb 2007

This needs a bit of consideration, and more defined shaping of the scene.

While the title presupposes the theme, it as it stands now is a little confusing to me; basically, I'm wondering if you have a pretty good image & mental snapshot of the of this man, posed in that odd bodily articulation assumed just before & during the coveted arrival of deathly-bliss; the opiate rushing
of the soul towards oblivion...

Or if he just discovered that it was laced with acid and had a sporadic thought, or image, of enhancing the coming madness with the consumtion of an bloody orange.

In short, I'd be happy to see this piece recieve some sharper definition. The image and thought this poem grasps for is worth perfecting. Till then, mate, heres a seven.