poemranker ::Replying

ReplyTo a comment on One Moment to the Other (v2) by nentwined.

Quarton25 Feb 2003

I liked this and the rhyme is well done except for the last two stanzas. Not sure I like mem'ry and
temp'ry and you need to ask yourself if you would have written thus if there was no need to rhyme.
Also, last stanza..."in that which is" seems awkward as fillers to balance the rhythm and pace. The second stanza is my favorite.