-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.21 Sep 2003

I say "MEDIOCRE POEME CHECKLISTE AHOY", and frantically pull my trousers down in preparation.

[_] AABB rhyming scheme
[_] About romantic love
[_] About writing
[_] About suicide or self-mutilation
[_] Arbitrary indentation
[X] Arbitrary line breaks
[_] Autobiographical but in the third person
[X] Clerical errors
[_] Clichéd imagery (gazing out of window, pits of despair)
[_] Clichéd rhymes (love/above, heart/apart)
[_] 'Depression' words (putrid, wretched, darkness)
[X] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments
[X] Devoid of rhyme
[X] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices
[X] Devoid of wondrous or fantastical imagery
[_] Drug reference
[_] Elves, unicorns, etc.
[_] Insipidly whimsical or zany
[_] Internet shorthand or emoticons
[_] Leaving rant
[X] Lower case only
[_] 'Lyrics'
[_] Melodramatic
[_] Naively religious or superstitious
[_] Obsessed with femininity
[X] Overabundance of ellipses
[X] Pointedly unanswered questions
[_] Rage against the machine
[_] Reference to the author's 'social life'
[_] Repetition of a word or phrase to the point of nausea
[_] Sanctimonious
[X] Self-obsessed
[_] Sentimental
[_] Smugly-named protagonist
[_] Thesaurophilia
[_] Untitled
[_] Vicarious wish fulfilment

-10-