some deleted user
on Aftermath of a boston marriage by Sugar Victim
19 Sep 2003, 2:35 PM
a little uneven..but so is hate-crime.
..
some deleted user
on some deleted poem
19 Sep 2003, 2:40 PM
Great~~~~~~~~~~
I wish you didn't need the rhyme either. looking for something is better than waiting for nothing.
The question marks bother me but the sentiment is ghoulishly pecking. 7.
NO, Dear. the last line is good. put the first and last lines together...
"Still waiting for you to come my way,
Not waiting for you to tell me the truth."
some deleted user
on some deleted poem
19 Sep 2003, 2:34 PM
I can't store you, but I can try to put you in a mason jar.
some deleted user
on some deleted poem
19 Sep 2003, 2:36 PM
Beautiful. 10
good poem.
some people don't like arbitrary indents and carriage returns but I think it keeps you on your toes.
We all die. That's what you do. but for now. stay living and write more.
some deleted user
on some deleted poem
19 Sep 2003, 2:46 PM
poo happy. piss is mine.
some deleted user
on some deleted poem
19 Sep 2003, 2:50 PM
Sausage is the other pink meat.
some deleted user
on some deleted poem
19 Sep 2003, 2:58 PM
thank you.
now is the time for redemption.
A well cooked sausage can do wonders for a plate of dull spaghetti.