horus8
replying on Doped Up Dr. Seuss by smlink84
25 Dec 2002, 10:05 PM
i met his wife at a charity event in san diego last month. hilarious. really fucking odd bird.
almost there, maybe add another beginning sentence for 'setting' than space, then stanza, sentence close.
well since i'm down with that italian bink, i'll be moving on...to better things and this was nice.
i think doctor suess was doped up enough originally. he's to the world of books what ozzy is to the world of music.
keen observation.
i've already excepted life's bitchlyness by becoming extremely sarcastic and indifferent. and i'll only except your family if it comes equiped with a drunken uncle phil, gold-digger aunt sarah, and a cousin tim who sells pot to his nana, whose name must by mary, but she is always called nana...even by her banker.
i'm not fooling, i'm actually giving my favorite of all time george bush quotes. yes, he really did say all of that in response to hussien saying he had no chemical weapons. yes, the man is a comical genuis.
thank you. then again, maybe you should let me have a taste, since mullets from the front side usually have that feature stereotyped to them. if only i wasn't so fucking lazy all the time and actually spent more time looking at people's web sites i'd have known about mulletjunkie.com so much sooner. one of my favorite vacation hobbies is photographing mullets. i have a couple great ones from the last time i went to disney world. i'll let you know when i find them.
no...but i did now.
HOW KEEP DARK AND PATTERN OFF
How keep dark
and pattern that any man suffers
off--at the wall, at where the hat
comes out of the maroow & yawns--
how keep head up the scream
& up the burial where the pattern is born--
how the leagues washing their hearts
& wrung dry only to sponge back up--men
smooching mirrors--blades honing--
tongue & eyelash of Sweet Thing
staggering the shape by the door in the baggy shadow--
how keep dark back?
Or should one bullet-forth, sleek-clothed or naked-- pierce
each entity--each clock--sharpened by art
or wine--how
enter the needle, the cloth--
how take the pattern any man suffers
and lose nothing when you
rip it off.
Stan Rice, Some Lamb 1975.
[editor's note,by horus8]here something else for you and gardel's tango don't let your pride turn your heart to the drink on the mirror to the lines in the glass dusting hollow, i'm indifferent, you're not.
wow. strong ending. i think you need another wait for 'an' emotional balance to the overall piece of
<shit>
Seem's like it right? I had fun writing this.
Are you old man river's retarded cousin? Yes, I thought so.
I liked the gist of this poem, but the meataphors you decided to use hold no particular meaning in literature or even logically. " Crocodiles drown in synchronized sorrow," I really thought of this particualr verse as, well stupid. Don't be offeneded, as I said like the theme behind this poem and thought it better than many of the others I have read. I'm only trying to help you out. It would be alot better if you added symbolism that made sense. for instance, a candle is usally related to life, a hawk is reffered to as the soul.
Sorry...I don't dig...although I do dig mullets..ahhhhhhh....
Must you steal from my site?
merry x-mas mr. bogs hehehe http://poetry.rotten.com/eye-gouge/