on would i be considered crazy by silvertongueddevil
22 Aug 2002, 1:55 AM
Definitely crazy but it makes a good poem. Some of the language in the econd stanza is a bit stilted ('re-engage my interest in food' especially) but the idea is so compelling that it wins out.
on cold sonnet by <~>
21 Aug 2002, 8:26 AM
That's an interesting revision of sonnet form - no real regular rhyme scheme, shortening lines, but a final couplet to pull the whole together. 'Piney hearts' is very good.
on some deleted poem
21 Aug 2002, 3:21 AM
OK, that's fine. The explanation is good, that's what I need! Point taken, and I shall concentrate on some god-like genius stuff....
on Various 7-Eleven hold ups... by Bachus
22 Aug 2002, 1:25 AM
Actually quite funny
on some deleted poem
22 Aug 2002, 1:51 AM
I love the punning of 'fishermen' 'casting tales' - subtle. And the ending is so quietly regretful. Wonderful.
on would i be considered crazy by silvertongueddevil
22 Aug 2002, 1:57 AM
Definitely crazy but it makes a good poem. Some of the language in the second stanza is a bit stilted ('re-engage my interest in food' especially) but the idea is so compelling that it wins out.
on some deleted poem
22 Aug 2002, 2:00 AM
I like this, but cherriesdon't grow on a vine. I know it sounds pedantic but in a form as compressed as haiku you have to make the image really count.
on Dear Ms. Sexton by <{Baba^Yaga}>
22 Aug 2002, 1:17 AM
OK, horus8/bachus/baba yaga, you win, I can't be bothered with this split identity thing any more, you just keep on ranting in your clever/remedial way and I'll steer round it and maybe we'll both be happy. And Dark Angel - would you prefer that I hate everything equally? Surely one of the points of criticism is that you discuss a single poem on its merits rather than swaggering in with a predetermined persona dispensing shards of ill-formed and meretricious nonsense? And I said Tom Waits because that's exactly what it sounds like. Did you take exception to that comment because you don't know what I'm talking about?
on Dear Ms. Sexton by <{Baba^Yaga}>
22 Aug 2002, 1:40 AM
Bleeding hell, this has nothing to do with Memorybabe - I just thought that, while you might not like her poem very much, there was no need to be so brutal. Just who exactly do you think you are? But now I find out you think you're at least three people, and frankly I can't be arsed to deal with your semi-literate Roseanne Barr-like affectations.
on would i be considered crazy by silvertongueddevil
22 Aug 2002, 1:56 AM
Definitely crazy but it makes a good poem. Some of the language in the second stanza is a bit stilted ('re-engage my interest in food' especially) but the idea is so compelling that it wins out.
on would i be considered crazy by silvertongueddevil
22 Aug 2002, 1:56 AM
Definitely crazy but it makes a good poem. Some of the language in the second stanza is a bit stilted ('re-engage my interest in food' especially) but the idea is so compelling that it wins out.
on some deleted poem
21 Aug 2002, 3:46 AM
Now I hear them! I think the stones in the last stanza were putting me off, I was trying to relate them to the 'them' in the first stanza. Perhaps if you changed the 'stones' to 'trees' it would become clear? The 'mystery of God's breathing' is fine once it's clear that's the wind - very Romantic, I like the way that harks back to Coleridge etc.
on Secret, Admirer by <~>
21 Aug 2002, 9:01 AM
I preferred the first draft-it was more compact and immediate, and was suggestive rather than explicatory.
on some deleted poem
21 Aug 2002, 3:27 AM
Well hey, God's wife, I like this, evn though the mystery for me is over-obscure. The 'them' are too enigmatic for me to 'see' (but maybe I'm not one of the chosen). But what they say is powerful - like Eliot's 'Humanity cannot bear too much reality', and it's quite true.
on some deleted poem
21 Aug 2002, 3:32 AM
Again, this grabs you by the throat. IS this Queen Anne of England? She who had myriad still-born babies? I wonder if you are referring to some kind of self-loathing on the part of a woman who cannot, try as she might, give life and her own life, like a baby inside, becomes something to be extinguished. Again, maybe too mysteriously opaque for me(I'll probably find that my interpretation of it is miles from anyone else's), but I like it.
on some deleted poem
21 Aug 2002, 3:53 AM
The addressee of this poem is obviously problematic - no one's fault but my own! It's the old ex-love figure, someone who is in effect 'dead' in that you never see or speak to them but who lives as a ghost in your memory. The narrator knows where the ex lives and imagines her/him thinking about the narrator, imagining what they're doing etec. But the very fact I have to explain this means my focus was right off when writing this poem.
on A Nightmare by Dreamer
21 Aug 2002, 4:07 AM
This is rather melodramatic - I'd really get rid of the aposiopoesis at the end.
on Making Sense in Plain Living by Flaithri
21 Aug 2002, 6:34 AM
I didn't really understand the title and this sounds more like prose than poetry
on some deleted poem
21 Aug 2002, 3:49 AM
I knew my interpretation would turn out to be a bit eccentric! But self-hate is the same whichever Anne you plump for.