replying on The Sidekick Retires From Fairview's Finest by luzrheroguy
27 Mar 2005, 8:15 PM
WOW! It's you!
It's weird (maybe that's not the right word), but I am naturally attracted to your poetry. I didn't even know this poem was by you, but I was drawn to the poem and then drawn into the poem.
I like your way of writing. (I have a confession to make --- I have been reading a lot of your poems, although I didn't vote on them. I should have.)
There is a definite authenticity about how you write that is very attractive, like you are baring yourself, baring your journal for people to read, only it rhymes and it's VERY good.
Anyway, I am definitely drawn to your writings, as are others. Don't stop. It's a gift...... juli harrelson :)
It's weird (maybe that's not the right word), but I am naturally attracted to your poetry. I didn't even know this poem was by you, but I was drawn to the poem and then drawn into the poem.
I like your way of writing. (I have a confession to make --- I have been reading a lot of your poems, although I didn't vote on them. I should have.)
There is a definite authenticity about how you write that is very attractive, like you are baring yourself, baring your journal for people to read, only it rhymes and it's VERY good.
Anyway, I am definitely drawn to your writings, as are others. Don't stop. It's a gift...... juli harrelson :)
on Youth by thepinkbunnyofdoom
19 Mar 2005, 7:45 PM
awesome. Good grief, man! This is really good stuff.
on Children in the Storm by thepinkbunnyofdoom
19 Mar 2005, 7:38 PM
ANOTHER good one.
on Sophia, Lets get this over with by thepinkbunnyofdoom
19 Mar 2005, 7:35 PM
"Come, lets dance, with flames and silhouettes"
I REALLY like that imagery. In fact, your whole poem was like I was right there. I was right. You ARE very articulate...and very intelligent. Poetry pretty much tells on a person, who they are and all that.
A very good piece.
I REALLY like that imagery. In fact, your whole poem was like I was right there. I was right. You ARE very articulate...and very intelligent. Poetry pretty much tells on a person, who they are and all that.
A very good piece.
on pihsdneirf ruo fo dne eht(The Burn) by thepinkbunnyofdoom
19 Mar 2005, 7:11 PM
oooops. I forgot to vote
on pihsdneirf ruo fo dne eht(The Burn) by thepinkbunnyofdoom
19 Mar 2005, 7:10 PM
I can tell you are a pretty intelligent person, maybe above average, and very articulate...I like this poem. I wrote one about being "burned" once....one of the phrases was
.....new skin under the burns......
This poem brought it to mind. That's all I can remember of my "burned" poem. I was pretty crazy over that guy. I've forgotten all about him now, oh...and the poem was thrown away with the memory. That's all I could retrieve from that dusty part of my memory.
Good stuff, pinkbunny-guy. I'll read some more of yours.
.....new skin under the burns......
This poem brought it to mind. That's all I can remember of my "burned" poem. I was pretty crazy over that guy. I've forgotten all about him now, oh...and the poem was thrown away with the memory. That's all I could retrieve from that dusty part of my memory.
Good stuff, pinkbunny-guy. I'll read some more of yours.
on The Sidekick Retires From Fairview's Finest by luzrheroguy
19 Mar 2005, 7:03 PM
I really like the first verse a lot. It's smooth and clear:
"My best was never enough
Against you at your worst
I'm always a close second
Compared to your first"
I like how it rhymes just here and there without sounding fake or funky. It sounds like it just flowed out that way.
"My best was never enough
Against you at your worst
I'm always a close second
Compared to your first"
I like how it rhymes just here and there without sounding fake or funky. It sounds like it just flowed out that way.
on Black Clouds by Haleyj
19 Mar 2005, 1:08 PM
"Basking beneath
All of the darkened stars"
Comment: I like that! It has opposites in it. Good word use, I think.
"Iâll build myself up
Donât rely on anyone
Because people can change
And secrets can be undone"
Comment: I like the sound and truth in that rhyming.
I think this is a good introspective poem
- juli :)
All of the darkened stars"
Comment: I like that! It has opposites in it. Good word use, I think.
"Iâll build myself up
Donât rely on anyone
Because people can change
And secrets can be undone"
Comment: I like the sound and truth in that rhyming.
I think this is a good introspective poem
- juli :)
Another REALLY good poem, very real, too, like you are writing in your journal or writing a letter to someone about this girl. Just a few comments:
***The words I haven't even wrote yet
***Burning brightly on my tongue
VERY good imagery! This alone made me want to keep on reading.
***And then I'll spend the rest of my evening
***Dancing a tactful tip-toe
***Between polite, and real conversation
***Remembering that words are weapons
***And you never liked the smoking barrel of my tongue
***So I'll have to try and keep it unloaded
This really struck me. You are so open and well articulated that I can actually "see" how you and this girl are (or were), what your relationship is like. You tend to be hard, but you are tender with this girl.
***A second first,
The only part that I dind't "get" was the "a second first". What does that part mean?
Overall, VERY nicely done.
juli harrelson :)