on talkstupid by 7!3
18 Apr 2006, 12:16 AM
lol! nicely done
on He Kissed Me by PoeticXTC
9 Jan 2006, 9:00 PM
i like it the emotion is strong i'd maybe cut the last two stanzas though.
replying on portrait of powerlessness by digipoet
9 Jan 2006, 8:55 PM
hmmm i already took off the line "why did you render me thus" but i can see your point too! thx
replying on floss every day by digipoet
9 Jan 2006, 7:20 PM
lol
replying on floss every day by digipoet
9 Jan 2006, 7:19 PM
rest assured the intent is decidedly sarcastic. :) thx for the comment.
replying on portrait of powerlessness by digipoet
9 Jan 2006, 7:15 PM
hmmm. no i don't maybe I should though I'll check out her poems.
replying on portrait of powerlessness by digipoet
9 Jan 2006, 7:14 PM
yeah it retrospect i agree the last line is kind of pointless...i guess i thought it was needed to emphasize the others actions towards the subject but it is already clear enough. thx.
Maybe three stanzas would be better:
the parcels of
your face i see
reflect no condemnation
my meager rise
its ceiling low
falls short of inspiration
can Icarus
spectacular
survive humiliation