on Devil, BEWARE!!! by gay
19 Aug 2002, 7:18 PM
uh oh. looks like there's someone more l33t than D.A. in the house....
on Heavenly HOst! by gay
19 Aug 2002, 9:13 PM
nor can he walk on land. gills be damned, toss this one in the...can...
on purple by youngweirdo
19 Aug 2002, 6:46 PM
this poem damages my thaughts.
on Ambiguous Love Poem For A Girl I Once Knew by poetandknowit
19 Aug 2002, 7:06 PM
p&k--who were you referring to? i most certainly did not give you a 0.
on Once Sought by necroscope7
20 Aug 2002, 7:44 AM
the ending seems a little clumsy to me, esp. 'the wrong place for each'. i get the sense that these things you sought were all about, yet you focused on where you wanted to find them, unwilling to see them beside you. yes?
on Why Me? by Tarquin De La Bog
19 Aug 2002, 7:08 PM
t de la b, you were really going for a zero here, weren't you? you're not getting one from me, D.
on the toxic noise by fleshpedler
19 Aug 2002, 7:10 PM
is this another mask? you know who you are. y or n?
on some deleted poem
20 Aug 2002, 7:35 AM
yes. it simply must. heed the dark one's wishes. change the title.
on Secret, Admirer by <~>
20 Aug 2002, 7:41 AM
this is a second draft, and i am not happy with it. suggestions, please? i seem to have lost my way with it.
on A Tender Kiss by Jody Conn
19 Aug 2002, 9:06 PM
it almost seems as though you are using this as a mantra to convince yourself that what you two have will finally save you...
on some deleted poem
19 Aug 2002, 9:10 PM
<<Why does I have not find>>
what? who? or, most importantly, WHY? why does I have to read this? why does the author torture me so? <<But how, till when , who can help me ?>> did you hear that out there, WHO CAN HELP ME????
what? who? or, most importantly, WHY? why does I have to read this? why does the author torture me so? <<But how, till when , who can help me ?>> did you hear that out there, WHO CAN HELP ME????
on some deleted poem
19 Aug 2002, 7:14 PM
DA, your meter trips itself in several places. you are capable of so much more. i am disappointed.
on Heavenly HOst! by gay
19 Aug 2002, 7:16 PM
unholy desires, indeed. did blake help you with this? no, wait, it shows a sense of humor. he couldn't have had a hand in this one.
on Ambiguous Love Poem For A Girl I Once Knew by poetandknowit
19 Aug 2002, 7:22 PM
h! A 10? methinks the merlot might be gracing you with winegoggles. it's good, but not quite there yet. something is missing to make it a 10. still, after a second read, it holds its head high.
on the toxic noise by fleshpedler
19 Aug 2002, 7:25 PM
you keep trying on different personas...and there are some ideas broached here...not fully developed...but, then again, your narratives are always immediate, fleshy, salty...which is why this one confused me. whose ever it is is stabbing at metaphysics, but has not lasted their 8 seconds in the flux as yet
on Ambiguous Love Poem For A Girl I Once Knew by poetandknowit
19 Aug 2002, 6:55 PM
why, p&k! you surprise me! i will read this one again. i liked it very much after a first glance. nice job. your other stuff seems shallow, paired with this pithy (and maybe a little self-pitying, which is understandable) piece.
on To You, In Warmer Climes by <~>
19 Aug 2002, 7:51 PM
babbit--i have taken your suggestions re: the articles in the first stanza. thanks. it think it improves the poem. -z
on Posing A 'mission (A Haiku Triad) by gay
19 Aug 2002, 6:51 PM
ha ha! the blade turns to me! parry away, sir. you have met your match! (well done)