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20 most recent comments by DreamerSupreme
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Re: godhead by ThePariahDog 17-Dec-03/2:48 PM
Lovely.. I love it. 10! oh wait, I forgot to give my blessing!

oh well.
Re: Black Beach by Caducus 7-Jan-04/2:13 PM
Great work caducus, twas a good read. Nine.
regarding some deleted poem... 7-Jan-04/6:59 PM
Well, I think its smashin..
Re: Under Trees by Caducus 27-Apr-04/4:09 PM
I have just one nit-pick:

"I held myself in my arms"

Just curious, how exactly did you manage that? lol.
Anyway, you have earning a blessing of seven.
Re: Love, Fair by MacFrantic 27-Apr-04/4:26 PM
Perhaps you could use "sign" instead of statue.. I believe that would work.. but this piece doesn't really tickle my fancy at all. It does tempt me to write my own version of it including giant mushrooms and drunken horny gnomes, but then again, it doesn't irritate me enough to motivate my quill to create such a mockery.
Re: Translation by Dovina 3-Jul-04/9:26 AM
Oh the ways that one succumbs. Take my eight and go in peace oh ms. shady tongued and polite.
Re: Rap? Hip-hop? What has this thing become? by DreamerSupreme 23-Apr-07/8:38 PM
Like Nas said: Hip-Hop is dead.

Re: Jealousy by Person 23-Apr-07/8:47 PM
Hello Rockmage. ;)
regarding some deleted poem... 15-Dec-08/12:44 AM
I dig the imagery... but the meaning/point eludes me. -shrug- Mayhaps the liquor hath clouded my vision?
Re: Daydream Delusions by hobojo 15-Dec-08/12:49 AM
The ghosts of our dreams grip us with the fingers of eternity... they are our real addiction- that which we see yet can not attain.

Do not allow the misery or intoxication to warp thy craft with pimple-like amateurism. Seek to use these aspects of your mental enviroment to focus and sharpen the blade utilized in the execution.

No Vote.
Re: Realizations by hobojo 15-Dec-08/2:09 AM
Life sucks the soul right out of a ripe tit don't it?
Re: Surreptitious merchandise and company held here by A. Nomaly 15-Dec-08/2:12 AM
The ending seems purposely designed to confuse. That or you were seized by an epileptic episode.
regarding some deleted poem... 15-Dec-08/2:15 AM
Damn it man, write with the pen and stop jabbing at the paper.
Re: Always by hobojo 15-Dec-08/6:36 AM
The use of the word like in the manner you've employed it above? Don't. Saying "will forever last" in a vain attempt to avoid saying the tired "will last forever"?
Don't. Repetetive redundancy? Eliminate it. If it's constant, then there's no need to say it'll last forever.

Do not ever cheapen what you are trying to express in such ways. You need to reconsider the way you go about constructing your poems. Become thy editor motherfucker!

Consider this:

You are the
eternal sundown
the distant rain
pouring down,
an ocean wave
receding-- lingering
in the distance just
beyond my grasp.

You are the ever-present
reminder of pleasant memories;
maintaining the sadness,
making me yearn for the past.

Yesterday has long since passed,
but you're still here,

--That's just a quickie example. Notice the difference?- Clear, fluid, with a crisp finish.

It's not what you're saying, it's how you say it. Capiche? Find thy style and, by god, develop it.
Re: when light cannot see your face by daggatolar 15-Dec-08/6:44 AM
Apparently you also can not write either. Stop grasping for the appearance of profoundness. You haven't gripped upon anything but the air and your own literary flatulence.
Re: Marrakech Watercolours by Caducus 15-Dec-08/6:47 AM
It's got soul. More soul than I posses.
Re: A Way With Words by LARoundtree 15-Dec-08/6:57 AM
Take your hallmark style cliche and that didactic expression of a lambs vacuous ethic and go back to your "happy place". Stay there and don't sully the taste of those who sustain themselves on a diet of meat & cold glasses of reality. If you don't? You'll be the next chop that I devour in an act of savagery.
Re: Dancing with the Devil by Liam Wallace 15-Dec-08/7:01 AM
Don't question the meaning of the dance. Dance and let the meaning express itself.

You get a three only because I like the title and you display a wee-bit of cleverness.
Re: Broken Heart by Luul A 15-Dec-08/7:03 AM
Oh god, what a wet blanket dripping bedpee all-over the fucking place. What the fuck is wrong with you?
regarding some deleted poem... 2-Jan-09/7:56 AM
It ain't concepts of paradise that fuck it all up--

It's the gods and the different ways of observing them, and the monopoly each one claims to have on their variant forms of paradise, that make it so hellish on earth that one is stressed into religion-- seeking prescribed forms of paradise lost.

We gave this deity form... why don't we fucking kill him/her/it already and skip to the paradise part of it all?

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