poemranker ::Always Forever by Princess_Snowflake

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Free verse № 126290

Always Forever

by Princess_Snowflake

Member since 2003 · Posted 5 Jun 2005 · 8 comments

You'll be leaving this place where you've been for almost a few years. It is time to say goodbye to the place you've been and remember the times like it was just yesterday. Although when you're gone we will be friends always forever and always be keeping in touch. It will be the time when you look for something that is new that you might have been dreaming of. I'll be missing you but we will always forever be friends.

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mean 1.00 weighted 4.81 rank 10937 views 157 View voting details →

2 votes so far. Yours would make 3.2 votes so far

8 comments

[2] Dovina 5-Jun-05/10:19 PM Reply
How long is "almost a few years"?
How long is "always forever"?
[n/a] deleted user › Dovina 6-Jun-05/3:31 AM Reply
The problem with most writing critters (a Rockmage tone now) is that they write without thinking. Contradictions and pleonasms (f.i. 'tiny little firefly') can unintentionally turn out comical or ridiculous if they're not thought over by the author.
This one contains a contradiction, and it's not >>always forever<<. The contradiction is in lines 12-13 and lines 15-16.

There is a poetic thought in this poem, but not one poetic line. There's not one moment where I give a shit about you and your dear friend. You wrote this to please yourself and did't give a shit about your readers. Hence my zero.

[2] Dovina › deleted user 6-Jun-05/5:33 PM Reply
I believe you are shouting at Princess Snowflake while looking at me. At least I hope so.
[n/a] deleted user › Dovina 6-Jun-05/5:37 PM Reply
Am I shouting? I'm not shouting. But you're right Dovina; my mouse squinted again.
[2] Dovina › deleted user 6-Jun-05/5:39 PM Reply
o I see, "There's not one moment where I give a shit about you and your dear friend," was said calmly and smilingly.

Forgiven, anyway.
[n/a] deleted user › Dovina 6-Jun-05/5:47 PM Reply
Why did you think I was addressing you?? I was reviewing the poem. Unless P_Snowflake is a Dovina alias?
[2] Dovina › deleted user 6-Jun-05/5:49 PM Reply
Your comment appears as a reply to mine. That's the same as talking to me. If you want to address the poet, your comment should be placed in the comment box right under the poem.
[n/a] deleted user › Dovina 6-Jun-05/6:01 PM Reply
I'll watch it. Next time when I click the wrong box, I'll delete it and try again. I have actually a state of the art mouse. It's a Philippe S+arck design, looks like a metallic beetle and has a blue-lighted strip on its back. The scrolling wheel is illuminated in the same way. It looks like a Flash Gordon car. All other pc components look like 1960's Tupperware