poemranker ::not to settle for less than almost obliteration by ay deee

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Free verse № 133303

not to settle for less than almost obliteration

by ay deee

Member since 2005 · Posted 12 Nov 2005 · 11 comments

i went a little too far yesterday there was a fire and i let it burn i wanted consumptive flames but now i can't put it back together without strong glue this happens from time to time the thrill of pushing too hard

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mean 5.33 weighted 5.09 rank 6231 views 174 View voting details →

6 votes so far. Yours would make 7.6 votes so far

11 comments

[8] zodiac 13-Nov-05/12:55 AM Reply
"consumptive" is a great word, but probably not what you meant.
[n/a] ay deee › zodiac 14-Nov-05/8:56 AM Reply
engaged in, causing, or encouraging the consumption of food, materials, or goods, especially in a wasteful or destructive way

that's pretty close, especially: materials, destructive
not speaking of tuberculosis

it is a great word, thank you
[8] zodiac › ay deee 14-Nov-05/9:32 AM Reply
I'll tell you, most people are going to think Val Kilmer in Tombstone saying "Ah'm your huckleberry."
[n/a] ALChemy › zodiac 14-Nov-05/10:28 AM Reply
I loved that line in that movie. I always use it and people are just like, "huh?".
[8] zodiac › ALChemy 14-Nov-05/10:32 AM Reply
At risk of this conversation turning to fawning mush, yes. That one line's as good as the entire rest of Val's career, even including Willow.
[n/a] ALChemy › zodiac 14-Nov-05/10:49 AM Reply
We must not forget his turn in gay porn in Batman Forever.
[7] Dovina 14-Nov-05/12:45 PM Reply
The last line seems anti-theme. Being consumed and pushing don't quite go together.
[n/a] ay deee › Dovina 15-Nov-05/1:57 PM Reply
the thrill of pushing too hard being the theme, and letting something burn too long a specific instance of this.
[7] Dovina › ay deee 15-Nov-05/3:17 PM Reply
I see how it could work that way. But consumptive flames set me thinking you were passivly enjoying the fire.
[7] richa 15-Nov-05/2:28 PM Reply
If you give the instance you should not have to state the theme, it should be obvious.

Pushing too hard is not the best word choice to describe letting a fire get out of control.

Put 'it' back together; the only 'it' in this poem is the fire.

Strong glue to fix something that is burnt is unapt.

I like the rest of it though. It has a decent spine.
[n/a] ay deee › richa 18-Nov-05/8:51 AM Reply
you might be right

not the best for some cases, but as a coach pushes an athelete to perform, i also pushed my technique too hard in this particular instance

the 'it' of the second stanza refers to an object in the fire

unapt?