poemranker ::Today could be the last day by cpill

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Free verse № 144450

Today could be the last day

by cpill

Member since 2002 · Posted 6 Jul 2006 · 3 comments

Today could be the last day of my life I made a curry, rode my bike. The sunset took its time fading away, One orange at a time While sparrows madly cut and dived Cut and dived Madly took their flight Though the last days light of my life My clean bare feet still soft from the moist heat Timidly caress the wet gravel The rain starts again People shut their doors, Close the windows from dark rooms Whims to this weather The sun silently drowns on the grey horizon And it ends, this soft goodbye

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3 comments

[9] Ranger 10-Jul-06/12:09 AM Reply
Top stuff.
[8] Dovina 12-Jul-06/4:28 PM Reply
It was not the last day of your life, but could have been. But how were you to know? I believe you mean "through," not "though." "Whims . . ." is a line that be scratched, I think. Otherwise good. But I think some hint would be in order as to why the narrator thinks it could be the last day.
[n/a] cpill › Dovina 13-Jul-06/2:10 AM Reply
DAG! A typeo. I can't believe I didn't see that. If I edit I lose these comments :( Guess it stays.

"Whims..." line was intended to reflect on the "People", the every day us, and how we allow ourselves to victims of circumstance.

The theme, I guess, is about awareness of the moment. Awareness of life/time passing. It could be the last day for the narrator as it could be the last day for us all, and with that as the back drop to experience, even the ordinary seems crisp and alive.

Thanks for your comment (and correction!), I'd not really analysed it much until now.