Mommy, why does -=DarkAngel=- use 'an' so much?

There once was an angel who fell. In love with an cow's swinging bell. He played it all day and wore a toupe'. He named his beef sweet Jezabel. He was darker than most but no cad. With neither an mom nor an dad. He sold them to God for an yard full of sod. The back of his shirt says "i 'm so rad!". Then the dark one met his match. An three legged prawn with an hatch. The prawn swung its leg and made the naive beg. For an full service job 'pon his snatch. The next day the angel was sore. And lying face down on an floor. The prawn had switched shell and stolen his bell. Now his beef packing days were no more. {now that's about as anti-superman-'deep'-haircut as you can get. Yet.}