the room's a'spinnin'

by nentwined

Member since 2001 · Posted 30 Sep 2002 · 7 comments

the room's a'spinnin' mah vision's twinnin', thinnin' should have fuckin' slept

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29 votes so far. Yours would make 30.29 votes so far

7 comments

[4] poetandknowit 30-Sep-02/12:07 PM Reply

huh.

[n/a] <~> 30-Sep-02/12:12 PM Reply

i want more impact on line 3, pretty please.

[n/a] nentwined › <~> 30-Sep-02/12:25 PM Reply

Hmm. just tossed the poem above the comment on the "reply to comment" page. That should make life a little easier. :) hmm.

more impact... "damn shit fuckin' cunt"? doesn't quite work. probably too delirious to think much about it at the moment. :)

"dawn has passed me by"

"sleep's for the, huh?"

"insert impact here"

"a bloody chainsaw"

"five sa-lyll-a-bles"

[n/a] Frass › nentwined 30-Sep-02/2:08 PM Reply

First off, thanks for this site, Nntwnd. This haiku reminds me of the lyric from the LP Up the Down Escalator: "had a minor, misunderstanding, with a street lamp, one night". Can you name the artist?

[n/a] nentwined › Frass 30-Sep-02/2:21 PM Reply

My pleasure, and thanks for thankin'. Graham Parker -- but honestly I had no clue; google is my savior. :) nice lyrics. I don't think my haiku does them justice, but ah trah. I think this one is running to beat DA out of the bottom list, though.

[7] INTRANSIT 30-Sep-02/5:44 PM Reply

OK, so you're not a kung fu master.
Or a haiku master for that matter.But, it's fun, take a friggin' nap will ya! And thanks for leaving my dumb ass on the site.You knew I'd be back didntcha?

[5] LilMsLadyPoet 11-Jul-05/8:01 AM Reply

LOL...cute!