poemranker ::Within A World by forestchild7

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Free verse № 3293

Within A World

Member since 2002 · Posted 7 Jul 2002 · 3 comments

Lost within a world of wonder, pausing where the streams don't flow; It's quiet, and I can feel the sunlight, streaming past me in little patches of gold. I step lightly and pause, listening to the birds, As they chirp and warble, and I know they are true words. I settle beside a tree, and listen to the wind; It wails and whistles to me, as if it will all my problems mend. This world of wonder seems such a beautiful place, And I sit here and think, of how I may spread the Mother's grace. We don't always listen; We're not always sure, but when we see the creation, We want to always be near her. So listen to your heart, Be quiet so the silence may speak; Remember Gaia's wisdom, and how we may be meek.

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mean 5.82 weighted 5.41 rank 3077 views 252 View voting details →

11 votes so far. Yours would make 12.11 votes so far

3 comments

[10] ==Doylum 19-Jul-02/5:45 AM Reply
Nother of thos lovely Ippy poems that speeks volumes about modern life. Gaia's wisdom, oh how true you are. Again I can't fault you, what a wonderful piece of writing
With not a turgid or pompous line insight. Heres ye well earned 10
[5] nentwined 31-Jul-02/4:29 AM Reply
the flow feels off for me; it would feel much more immediate, for instance, if "streaming past me in little patches of gold" read as "streaming past in patches of gold". (and so on...)

a nice message, but I couldn't get into it as a poem.
[5] dancin_n_da_moonlite 9-Apr-05/9:04 AM Reply
"as if it wil all my problems mend" ---- if you can't make your rhyming sound at all natural perhaps you should not try rhyming - this sounds incredibly forced