DetailsThe poem, its numbers, and the conversation.

Decay

Member since 2002 · Posted 20 Oct 2003 · 7 comments

Castle gate rusts as it guards the womb. Rusty Hull-ed ship carries disease Rusty shopping cart beggar on his knees Rusting old car road trippin' road trippin' Rusty old car clutch is a slippin' Rust Rust Rust Quiet rust The dollar bill chatters in god we trust The steeple of the church drips its' rusting chips The rusty Iron gate Guards the entrance to the tomb.

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18 votes so far. Yours would make 19.18 votes so far

7 comments

[6] -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 20-Oct-03/7:06 AM Reply

"Rusty Hull-ed ship
carries disease

Rusty shopping cart
beggar on his knees"

You may omit the rest.

[n/a] INTRANSIT › -=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 20-Oct-03/8:39 AM Reply

too simplistic an idea, huh?

[8] Shuushin 20-Oct-03/12:39 PM Reply

Very sexual; made me think of a chastity belt.

and with an excellent cadence.

[9] Jeremi B. Handrinos 20-Oct-03/2:24 PM Reply

Might I suggest a collapsing parking structure and a legless prostitute in a rusting radio flyer?

[4] poetandknowit 20-Oct-03/9:50 PM Reply

Beat us over the head. Go ahead. Beat us.

[n/a] INTRANSIT › poetandknowit 21-Oct-03/11:37 AM Reply

I know I'm a bane in the neck. Once I have "tooled up" a little better and gotten through some personal stuff, I will write better poetry. I assure you that hanging around the fives, while a great group as it is, is not my goal. I'm still learning patience. I ask nothing else from you.

[10] dancin_n_da_moonlite 5-Mar-05/11:27 AM Reply

i absolutely love this! i honestly have no idea why but i sense a brilliance in it! - 10 -