I love some of this! But great lines lose impact when mixed in with cliches. The last stanza is marvelous.

I love some of this! But great lines lose impact when mixed in with cliches. The last stanza is marvelous.

Liked this! (oh- spell cannot as one word...)

moon's midnight (add apostrophe)- you might consider using "among" the stars or even "with" the stars- or "along with the winking stars." Liked winking in there! liquor's been drained (apostrophe- standing for the liquor has been drained). I really liked "the home where our questionable demeanor was accepted, at times applauded" and felt that was next sadly contradicted by "or draped with scorn"- maybe soften that with- or occasionally draped with scorn? Liked this very much, good capture of a scene- good question at the end!

great line: "blood is still a favored paint" accidental typo in abundant, the "n" was dropped need an apostrophe in won't-and in poet's in "a poet's work" and in i'm (i'm accustomed) might be stronger to leave poets out of the first stanza since they are such a strong element in the second stanza. I liked "rainbow wizard in a pointy hat- very cute! Liked this overall, appreciated the point made... excellent line: emotions have....an abundant supply of lips in motion

clever!

Maybe title it Growth? add an apostrophe to one's in one's mind loved line: blossom with roots/ entwined deep within the soil--lovely. really like the last 3 lines.

you have a quill in the first line, a pen at the end- I think it would help to have "pen" in the first and last stanzas. arctic has two c's in it. Could have a capital a for Arctic, but does not have to. Cute reworking of the sentiment "I'll give you my guns when you pry them from my cold, dead hands"-

to stand is the opposite of being supine (2nd line) child's toy add an apostrophe I presume you are purposefully playing with the words faltered and faulted, deliberately combining them to coin a new word (faultered)?

really liked "lachrymose blades" for the weeping willow's branches and leaves-and you provide a somewhat surprising, good ending! Recommend using a colon after living statue. Semicolons are for joining 2 complete sentences.

Should be no comma in the second line. Should be- is an image- (an, not a) You might consider using "awarded the gold medal.", instead of "receiver of the gold medal"- just a suggestion.

I found the idea of "as boots scrape the last grains/ of our spirit into the receding ebbtide" a bit too opaque

candent veins- intense! I don't see how suspense is ever really placid... liked the ending1 Strong!

Recommend an apostrophe for Sinners' Saloon- (Saloon of Sinners)--what do you have against apostrophes? Good poem.

it's a bitch... you accidentally dropped the "n" in the word convince...

mummie's milk... found the poem funny, enjoyed it.

like many of the lines, such as "forging art from thought by crafting verse. The lines are uneven, some just do not match the craft of other lines... need apostrophes in poet's craft...one's imperfections...one's imaginary...one's self-perfection you do carry the argument through the whole poem...

foe's flesh...cannot (one word) shan't (shall not, a contraction) like how you were careful with the metaphor (this poem is a blade) so it is fitting you would "sheathe" it if it does not sell-great last line!

Shrooms! been a long time...

it's a matter It's annoying Pretty macabre!