Re: Metaphorically Challenged by Enkidu	cheese.doodles 76.64.14.95	26-Apr-07/4:31 PM
This is very funny and creative.
Re: Hatred and Perfection by laurahenn2010	laurahenn2010 75.88.141.64	26-Apr-07/5:40 PM
I wrote this back in September, when my life started unraveling. I'm not sure if it's any good, but I would like feedback. thanks.
Re: A Pen Named Ed by Enkidu	cheese.doodles 76.64.14.95	26-Apr-07/6:53 PM
tee, it's cute.
Re: The Way by Highschool_Poem_Girl	cheese.doodles 76.64.14.95	26-Apr-07/6:57 PM
whoa, way too long.
Re: 1982 County Stadium by jessicazee	Prince of Void 80.71.127.125	27-Apr-07/5:21 AM
it's a good poem 7
Re: Songs of the hedge bird by ALChemy	lmp 141.154.134.3	27-Apr-07/2:52 PM
it's tweet, really. :D
regarding some deleted poem...	lmp 141.154.134.3	27-Apr-07/3:00 PM
introspective, similar to the way learning portait artists often subconsciously capture their own likenesses within the faces of the subjects.
regarding some deleted poem...	lmp 141.154.134.3	27-Apr-07/3:04 PM
if you want to really make a go of these, at least make them forceful; say something. for instance, why ask one to "consider a life" that is "pathetically pointless"? the effort of reading that weak attack is just such an action.
regarding some deleted poem...	lmp 141.154.134.3	27-Apr-07/3:07 PM
redundant reptetives are foolish, especially in a form that limits the use of words to create a full image.
Re: new clothes, same old story by nypoet22	thetrev 86.20.231.0	28-Apr-07/2:18 PM
'fraid you inspired me to write a poem on the emperor, thanks!
Re: new clothes, same old story by nypoet22	half.italian 76.172.249.205	28-Apr-07/7:10 PM
Bare.
Re: requiem for the dead generation by Prince of Void	half.italian 76.172.249.205	28-Apr-07/7:12 PM
No poem shall go uncommented!
Re: Breath by thetrev	half.italian 76.172.249.205	28-Apr-07/7:13 PM
I think you are trying tooo hard.
regarding some deleted poem...	half.italian 76.172.249.205	28-Apr-07/7:17 PM
Haikus arn't short enuf. Actually I like it! I would name this 'rockmage' though. :)
regarding some deleted poem...	half.italian 76.172.249.205	28-Apr-07/7:18 PM
I think there are much more interesting things about cats.
Re: A most malodorous mockurance by bharat shekhar	bharat shekhar 59.176.3.88	29-Apr-07/1:36 AM
No votes.No anecdotes
regarding some deleted poem...	Ranger 81.103.124.179	29-Apr-07/2:02 PM
Nice turn at the end, a charming little ode to the cat. I see a certain stealth-of-movement within the meter which creeps rather cat-like, although I think you could play around with it a little more.
Re: new clothes, same old story by nypoet22	Ranger 81.103.124.179	29-Apr-07/2:05 PM
Interesting that you don't punctuate the last line. It suggests that he's ugly (when) naked. If so, what is he the rest of the time? Beautiful? Or just hidden? Nice and concise.
regarding some deleted poem...	SupremeDreamer 130.65.109.104	29-Apr-07/2:21 PM
Can you not find something better to do? Jeezus H. Christ old boy! This simply shows a lack of talent. You make attacks, the attacks are ultimately childish. You can not even muster enough intellect to form a parody. What is wrong with you? Is it vindictive senility? Probably. I agree with the Half-Italian, the title should be renamed Rockmage. Then and only then will I give a vote of ten. No Vote.
Re: Hatred and Perfection by laurahenn2010	Ranger 81.103.124.179	29-Apr-07/2:23 PM
Pick an image. Any image, it doesn't have to be spectacularly original at this point. Perhaps the key would be a good one to use. Try to write something which just revolves around the key; be consistent (a lot of this poem is fragmented and unconnected except through the loose and quite vague emotions). Use either the key or door (or anything associated with whichever tactile object you pick) to represent you, and find similarities. What that should do, with a bit of practise, is help make the feelings that you put in come across with a bit more subtlety. In turn, that'll make the reader more likely to emphasise. If you say "I hurt", well I might nod sympathetically - but beyond that I can't connect with it; I can't relate to it (to use an old cliche). The best way to find out what works for you in poetry is to read plenty of it - find a genre you're likely to enjoy and have a go. Perhaps Sylvia Plath would be a good starting point from the evidence of this poem, or Poe if you want something more elaborate and gothic. Anyway, so sayeth -=Ranger=-. Hope it's of help.