cut the red wire. no...the blue one.

Sqwuelcher?

Crude and spiteful -0-

I once took some drugs and thought my head was a giant potato!!! Perhaps you would like to hear some more of my nutty, drug-related anecdotes?

Give me your leg. *unzip* I don't know where you're going, but I know you'll be wet with love.

You seem to have forgotten to make this poem make any sense.

Juvenile. -2-

Because the birds dropped their monocles off the side on a leisure cruise

I don't get it. Is this supposed to be some kind of allegory or are you just giving some late advice to Theseus in all lower case?

I am debonaire and handsome, trust me. but I guess the wings and fangs give it away sometimes.

"found a hand, instead of you"

Could you rhyme return with saturn, and onto with into, please.

Leaves something to be desired,But for the life of me I can't figure out what.

yay!

[X] AABB rhyming scheme [_] About romantic love [_] About poetry-writing [_] About suicide or self-mutilation [_] Arbitrary indentation [_] Arbitrary line breaks [_] Autobiographical but in the third person [X] Clerical errors [X] Cliched imagery (staring out of window, pits of despair) [X] Cliched rhymes (love/above etc.) [X] Devoid of alliteration or any such linguistic embellishments [_] Devoid of rhyme [_] Devoid of simile, reification or any such literary devices [X] Devoid of wond'rous or fantastical imagery [_] Drug references [_] Elves, unicorns, etc. [_] Exclamation points used to mark 'the funny bits' [_] Insipidly whimsical or zany [_] Leaving rant [_] Lower case only [X] 'Lyrics' [_] Melodramatic [_] Naively religious or superstitious [_] Obsessed with femininity [_] Overabundance of ellipses [_] Overuse of 'depression' words (putrid, wretched, darkness, etc) [_] Pointedly unanswered questions [_] Protagonist has a smug name [_] Rage against the machine [_] References to the author's 'social life' [_] Repetition of a single word or phrase to the point of nausea [_] Sanctimoniously moral [X] Self-obsessed [_] Sentimental [_] Thesaurophilia [_] Use of internet shorthand or emoticons [X] Vicarious wish fulfilment

Sex is neat. 10/10

saves the best for the last half no pretention

too wordy and not half as elegant or clever as horus8's dribbling piss and hate poems.

Compare me to Horus and you'll always be disappointed. He's a poet. I am just an angry person wishing you were dead. so bip bop boo.....fuck you too.

A treasure of words. A chowder of chow. A caucaphony of provolone, and suchers.