Re: Bitter by Ranger	LilMsLadyPoet 152.163.100.65	11-Jan-07/9:05 PM
Hi there....seems you have been as reclusive as I. I'm just back in, as well. I am glad I found something from you upon my return. Now for my honesty... The last line in s4 bugs me and doesn't work entirely. The caliber of the piece calls for something better there. The last line needs changing, IMO. Perhaps 'to die by love's decree', 'my eyes to never see' 'my love to never see' (or 'taste') or simply 'no road back to me' (which would put a rather melancholy note to the end, making one wonder if he truly distains her so and to imply an ever so slight longing and sadness.) You know I love your mind...this is fantastic and it shows your progress with rythm. I am also, as always, enchanted with the olde feel of these pieces. With this I see a more comfortable you going into a little darker place...you did it very well!
Re: Self Portrait by Dovina	LilMsLadyPoet 152.163.100.65	11-Jan-07/9:26 PM
I like this... but wonder why you capitalized Potter and His. Perhaps as a reference to God or The creator? If so, then I wonder what/who the painter is? I think, if the God reference was on purpose, I like it without the reference, as it speaks to the differences and sameness of creators of art. But the descriptions are very tactile, but with a God reference it makes the potter and clay so much less tactile and rather illusive. That said, whichever way it is meant to be, it is pretty good and the last two lines very good.
Re: Fanatic by Dovina	amanda_dcosta 61.17.227.236	11-Jan-07/9:26 PM
Very well put. An idea well conveyed.
regarding some deleted poem...	amanda_dcosta 61.17.227.236	11-Jan-07/9:31 PM
Very emphatic. A message well sent. A good write, Paul.
regarding some deleted poem...	amanda_dcosta 61.17.227.236	11-Jan-07/9:33 PM
Sweet.
regarding some deleted poem...	amanda_dcosta 61.17.227.236	11-Jan-07/9:35 PM
Could improve on this.
regarding some deleted poem...	amanda_dcosta 61.17.227.236	11-Jan-07/9:37 PM
You had a nice idea conveyed in the beginning.. but it sort of gave way by the second half, kinda like it didn't hold together that strong.
Re: Brackish by <~>	LilMsLadyPoet 152.163.100.65	11-Jan-07/9:43 PM
Pretty good. Needs cleaning up.
regarding some deleted poem...	amanda_dcosta 61.17.227.236	11-Jan-07/9:43 PM
Very good imagery here.
Re: A Year Later (edited a bit) by Sasha	LilMsLadyPoet 152.163.100.65	11-Jan-07/9:56 PM
I like this, but it needs a little cleaning up and seems too repetitive, to me.
Re: Loneliness by tuthaliash	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	12-Jan-07/7:15 AM
You too, sweet!
regarding some deleted poem...	Dovina 75.82.85.162	12-Jan-07/11:32 AM
Describing the colors and hues works well, until line 4 where show turns to tell. Also “knowing” detracts, at least for me, from the word-painting to match the real painting. And “succulent” seems to tell us too much about the answer. “precision caresses skin/ Flesh scent intoxicates breezes” – good.
Re: Bitter by Ranger	drnick 24.176.22.254	12-Jan-07/12:51 PM
dude, how have you been? do you still exist?!
Re: Fanatic by Dovina	drnick 24.176.22.254	12-Jan-07/12:53 PM
nice to know you're still writing about me ;) in all seriousness, very nice...how have you been?
Re: The huntsman's revenge by Stephen Robins	some deleted user 80.225.135.118	12-Jan-07/1:12 PM
Oh Dear
regarding some deleted poem...	xxx 67.172.190.253	12-Jan-07/6:29 PM
User Dovina replied to your Poemranker poem "Rockmage Rises". Their comment was: Oh good god! You're back zeroing everything at about fifteen seconds per poem, reading each one, of course. However shall I vote on this diatribe?
regarding some deleted poem...	xxx 67.172.190.253	12-Jan-07/6:32 PM
POOR Dovina! You ARE NOT a poet. I just see a messy bit of masturbation in all of your strung out words. Eye of the beholder and all that.
regarding some deleted poem...	wilco 24.92.74.122	12-Jan-07/7:14 PM
Where'd all your poemes go, Rock?
Re: New Year by wilco	wilco 24.92.74.122	12-Jan-07/7:16 PM
Came by, saw that Rockmage is back and just had to log in and post. Just something I wrote all drunk New Years Eve...just a little song. B F# E chord progression for anyone who cares.
Re: New Year by wilco	wilco 24.92.74.122	12-Jan-07/7:18 PM
Incidentally, this is my 91st submission with three years as a Poemeranker user nearly here, Feb. 18. I haven't been around much lately because I've been too busy to write, much less read. Seems the Ranker isn't doing too well? A pity. This place has given me a lot...I might even send Nentwined some money...but probably not.