regarding some deleted poem...	AlexandraLeaving 4.237.208.45	10-Jan-07/9:31 PM
Ilove this very original and straight to the point
regarding some deleted poem...	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	11-Jan-07/6:21 AM
Why do you do that with your poems? it's pretentious and detracts from the words. Oh hang on, having read the words I see why.
regarding some deleted poem...	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	11-Jan-07/6:22 AM
Awful.
regarding some deleted poem...	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	11-Jan-07/6:43 AM
I read a poem by Colin Skilton, It's fair to say he's no modern Milton, Sharing more in common with Peter Shilton, Or Paris Hilton.
regarding some deleted poem...	Stephen Robins 213.146.148.199	11-Jan-07/6:44 AM
Stick to colouring in.
Re: The dancers by richa	Shuushin 63.167.136.250	11-Jan-07/10:55 AM
wondering at the "I can see"s and the "I could see" seems unnecessary. and "under gravity" as is, doesn't provide much value, does it? Some beefier description of how the gravity works upon the dancer/stone. mebbe just a modifier for gravity; I don't know. "and then/[some simile of gravity], collapsing"/"then finding their feet" still, I like it alot.
Re: The dancers by richa	Dovina 75.82.85.162	11-Jan-07/11:15 AM
A nice comparison and even a bit emotional, for which you should be ashamed. "they." in S5 seems abrupt, as if something's missing.
regarding some deleted poem...	Dovina 75.82.85.162	11-Jan-07/11:20 AM
Either omit all punctuation or use it consistently. "I worship of thee" needs to lose the "of" (Obsenities deleted)
regarding some deleted poem...	Dovina 75.82.85.162	11-Jan-07/11:36 AM
Please forgive Stephen Robins; he’s an embarrassment sometimes. We keep him on for smirks and the occasional witty obscenity. Your poem carries a tender and sad message. “He ambles into memories” is good. but most of it is overwrought, or cliché, or over-simplified, for my taste at least. Consider removing or rephrasing these: stares into oblivion feels her love still in a world of shadows Where no sun can shine
Re: Bullet Heaven by MacFrantic	Dovina 75.82.85.162	11-Jan-07/11:44 AM
Rhythm is pretty constant until the last 3 lines, rhyme too. Why quit now?
Re: Asbestosis by Stephen Robins	Dental Panic 84.27.81.27	11-Jan-07/1:40 PM
Good title. And a good read. You could loose one 'school' in the last stanza, I think.
Re: Brinkmanshit by Stephen Robins	Dental Panic 84.27.81.27	11-Jan-07/1:49 PM
To be printed as a prayer for redemption in a rest-home - imagine spending the last years of your life being constipated: it's one of the hidden tragedies of humanity. Anyway, here's a link: http://goodlooguide.freeservers.com/
regarding some deleted poem...	Dental Panic 84.27.81.27	11-Jan-07/1:57 PM
Very good. Cataractic window-cleaners are the most dedicated.
Re: Better Sex by Dovina	-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I. 80.47.198.114	11-Jan-07/5:15 PM
You didn't have 'Better Sex'. You didn't even have sex. You just talked for two boring hours on the phone. Talk about gutted.
Re: portrait of powerlessness by digipoet	LilMsLadyPoet 152.163.100.65	11-Jan-07/7:04 PM
I think spelling it out with sadism was too obvious, some other word or earlier phrase to indicate that type of relationship would have been more refined. But perhaps you wanted to be blunt and state the thing that it is...but then you lose the complexity of it and apply a label for it. Hello, everybody, I'm Back:) As per my way, I will vote, post and then go see what you all had to say about this little piece.
Re: portrait of powerlessness by digipoet	LilMsLadyPoet 152.163.100.65	11-Jan-07/7:15 PM
I see you, Alchemy have not forgotten the one you were so venomous and combative toward...what, did you miss the sparring? It is rather amusing our scores matched...I am surprised. I do not know this person and this person does not know me. I logged on and searched my name...and at the top of the list was Alchemy mentioning me at this poem. digipoet...it was a nice entrance to find this poem. I disagree with dropping the entire last line. How about Safety, as the last word? something that wraps it all up and binds it together...no pun intended.
Re: Brinkmanshit by Stephen Robins	Bethy 165.154.46.109	11-Jan-07/7:43 PM
LMAO....you get a "10" from my mom...and one from me too... :) Bethy
Re: The dancers by richa	LilMsLadyPoet 152.163.100.65	11-Jan-07/8:29 PM
'in much the same way as they' needed tweaking, in my opinion. Wonderful, magical picture painted here...and so clearly, about an illusive subject. If you were a photographer you would have captured it on film. Very good!
regarding some deleted poem...	Dovina 75.82.85.162	11-Jan-07/8:32 PM
Welcome back. This is interesting and too much for a tired head. I'll get back to it tomorrow. BTW, Alchemy and Zodiac have gone missing. I'll give you a temporary 8 just for "ginger sprinkled orchid."
Re: Chord before the crescendo by Caducus	LilMsLadyPoet 152.163.100.65	11-Jan-07/8:35 PM
Oh man! Excellent! Sheesh....applause, definitely. Take a bow...this is fantastic... way to go Caducus! This is hitting my favorite folder.