This is totally unacceptable and also, shit.

Hillarious....9.

Here's a tongue-twister for ya: Sven said "Ted, send ten tents". Ted said "Sven, send ten cents". When Sven sent Ted ten cents, Ted sent Sven ten cent tents. Try to say that one even once, I dares ya.

Call your bluff while i clean off my spurs with your face...o

The title is spelled poorly sunshine. I'll vote later after an edit..the rest was good.

chew it until thawed at work.

Fucking brilliant. 10! But you knew I'd love this, didn't you. How do you write such things as you do? What I mean to say is that this stunned me to my soul. Shivering.

a burning sensation in the thigh region? You should see a doctor. seriously though, not bad so far.

Neat-O, amusing, different, and worthy. Here's a nine, for the sake of the signs in Morse code.

in tj they have a three colored stick to measure just how far a woman can take the donkey, and people bet on the various colored ruler.

I feel that this deserves high marks, though i'm not quite sure how this voting system works?

Lose the He, and just start it out with Smelling (that makes it universaly challenging) lose the 'an' completely, lose the to cover the fact...because we know that so it'll look like this. Smelling sweetly of some sad whore, with expensive perfume that a guy like you bought her. Because the title says the rest the chain of events is almost irrelevant when one is compressing

okay. the title is cliche. do you want that? or do you want this to be a specific person, and not a generalization? (hint!) are you talking to the man who smells of the perfume, or to a third party? keep it between 2 people--more intimate--and have the 'whore' reference be the outsider. or, make it between 2 women, bitter, and talking about a cheater-- He came home fragrant with some sad whore's expensive scent that a guy like him gave to sweeten the pang of his act something like that, maybe?

more like 22 million, three seperate installments, almost dont spending the first one. dont hate life. i promise to donate to charities :-)

work with me on the damn punctuation, h! you are getting tighter, so i will be harsher, since i'm good at the picky shit. so, CRACK!! tighten, boy! CRACK!!! and, you don't need the quotation marks on every occurance of the title. my sugg. is to make it a title once, and leave it as a description of a person the rest of the time.

"Like film off a camera" like film from a camera? film falls off a proector reel, and out of a camera...

I agree with Horus - good to leave out the time - they usually show up after noon anyway...

Funny

Ding dong the witch is dead.

Really lovely, a very fine picture can you switch the last two lines around somehow? the second line sounds more like the last note of a sweet sad song.