wOrnella Mutiw
on some deleted poem
27 Dec 2002, 7:20 PM
I'm 27, male, with a teaching credential. I'm quiet, polite (usually) and can strike up a conversation. Or if you just like your own space, I respect that too. I'm relatively normal. Probably the strangest thing about me is that I'm also a crossdresser but I'm not gay. No, I don't do that all the time. Let me know if I may work for you.
-B.
this would be more exciting if you changed basketball, to curling
this is AMAZING....i mean its so....amazing...i love that last stanza...ten all the way
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You're suffering from decidophobia, the fear of making decisions.....characterized my intnse sweating when faced with a decision.........cure--I'm a world reknown self-help guru...I was featured on Oprah a nuber of times...Dr. Phil can kiss my ass...anyway, back to you...buy my book Decidophobia: When evil forces strike innocent hemaphrodites......it's available on amazon.com
sweet but short...perhaps a little too...6
sweet but sappy...not my fave..but thats just my opinion...3
a container of pringles i can't eat in one sit down? [the missing part of the last sentence]
this reminds me of my college crush...Alfred Magnanimi...a short, stocky, blue-eyed, Italian stallion....man I loved that kid...his ideas of saying I love you was I hate you....ahhhhhh...going down memory lane.......anyway good read...8
You talkin' to me?.....hahaaaaaa...I think I love you......10
you should try getting a 3lbs. box of assorted chocolates from Wal Mart and eating the whole box....that should take care of your anger.....ahhhhhh
horus8 - i think that would actually take away from the poem.. this is about playing basketball, not about the anger. although you make good points, i think what you suggest would veer from the fact that basketball is a way to release all that anger, wherever it may be from, and just push yourself to play. well done! oh wait, i've told you that before :)
lovely..."cacophony then conceded, condensed, and coalesced
conjoined, as one voice made of many:
warp and weft, naive and deft,
high and low, fast and slow,
on it pulsed, out it flowed" <- great description....8
this is all second act. no first or third? it needs more arc. set up your anger more, so that we know why you are mad, exactly, and more of the process you took to expose that anger and fear in order to cure it..beyond just the basketball..that's only a third of the solution. where is the other two thirds? good first draft though. here's a seven.
shouldn't this be final thouhts?
pardon me if I don't respond with a lisp...Ha ha - you sooooooooo crazy.
Are you a Tar Heel?
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