poetandknowit
on Foreplay by INTRANSIT
23 Dec 2002, 2:26 PM
typos, oh typos how I would love it if there were no typos.
mr. winter does it again.??
"a small donkey's head. (Maybe)" ha, ha, ha oh shit..jesus. that's gotta be one of da's right..ha ha haaaaa. wohhhhhhhh shit, sorry.you're right. damn fine pasting.a
Did you just write this after our conversation? I remember 'tricked light' from some other poem, was it yours?
i still think clock should be cock.
Wow, I am not involved in this. I am overjoyed. Yeah you fuckwits.
Despite the negative comments, I actually quite like the poem. It looks like a poem that my college professor's assistant would write....have a 9
"I'm speechless. I'm sorry, and I have no wish whatsoever to spark a
race war, but as a Brit this typifies what I hate about Yanks. Where is
your style? This is an absolute horror of a piece. 0, and for the first
time ever if I could give minus points I would. The worst piece of shit
I've ever read on this site. I can't believe a poem has been posted
going through the moon for inspiration. Not only that, but your
verses are completely and utterly uninspiring. The final line beggars
belief, and your use of the moon throughout and the various references to
the moon suggest that you are a child pretending to be an adult.
Awful. "l
I feel something secondary going on here. Can't find it yet. I'll come back.
oh, yeah almost forgot. here's your three back.
THE BONES OF WOE
Golden are the bones of woe.
Their brilliance has no place to go.
It plunges inward,
Spikes through snow.
Of weeping fathers whom we drink
And mother's milk and final stink
We can dream but cannot think
Golden bones encrust the brink.
Golden silver copper silk.
Woe is water shocked by milk
Heart attack, assassin, cancer.
Who would think these bones such dancers.
Golden are the bones of woe.
Skeleton holds skeleton.
Words of ghosts are not to know.
Ignorance is what we learn.
BY STAN RICE, SOME LAMB 1975.
p.s [by horus8] i believe this will be the third poem of his i've sent you, you still have yet to mention what you dislike technicaly, personaly, or subliminaly. and if you were to read the "subtext" a bit closer you will find the 'check mate' it was fun while it lasted though. merry christmas.m
unless of course, he is stan rice. now that would be the ultimate in theatre. ha ha,(p&k = stan rice) than i'd be wrong, but i'm not am i.E
have you ever seen a red beaver coat? truly the most valued inflaming fur.e
why, lordie why no vaseline with my electrodes. simple. gerbal ran generator..
This is the best poem you've done - at least I enjoyed it more than any other you've done. By paring it down but avoiding minimalism you really more solidly strike the nerve that you fumble with in your more sprawling work. By the way, you might find my latest poem amusing.
7 for the effort. tear it down, weld and machine the crank,magnaflux the rods, new slugs,jugs and plugs. bearings. It'll run good.
see. i knew i ripped some sad bastard off. cheers. the wicky is sacred and since you agree. 9. also meeps are very tasteful too.
S-3 cornfuses me a bit. I am getting young lust from it though.
"Thats life," and down. Takes a nasty spin. too nasty for my tastes. Otherwise, keep steppin'.
are you calling me the amanuensis?
never.