Frass
on Ode to Poem Ranker by Lenore
21 Aug 2002, 4:09 PM
Alright; you've got relevant ideas, perspective. However, considering some of the things I've read on this site, I sincerely hope they don't come alive 'away into the words and deeds of others.' Submit more, Lenore.
babbit- this is wonderful.
It's like I can see it. Good job :)
ok, sorry you guys i got it the first time, before the comments, but i think its only because i have oft had the feeling that night was creeping up behind me while i fumble for the keyhole on a dark, creepy street...maybe its just me?
Terrific intil the last line. Feels like daddy was tellling you to hurry, turn off the lights and go to bed. This lovely poem deserves a stronger finish.
I second that. Great idea, so often our lives are more appreciated by outsiders then we can appreciate them ourselfs. Needs a hair cut though.
ok, sorry you guys i got it the first time, before the comments, but i think its only because i have oft had the feeling that night was creeping up bihind me while i fumble for the keyhole on a dark, creepy street...maybe its just me?
There is no hell. There is no hell. There is no hell. There is no hell. There is no hell. Kill yourself. It's the only solution. The only problem is, you're too weak. You weak, worthless nobody. Only kidding! have a great time on poemeranker!!
Loved reading this poem. Enticing...it's all I have to say about that.
Mr Shin Bojangles your haiku is obscure enough to be unrecognizable. Sorry for using up your space to post my oppinions on the mis-use of the word pussy. So many of the postings seem to be tongue-in-cheek and humorously absurd I thought it would be fun to challenge some of the natives. Again, please forgive. As for you dark angel I am no ones alter ego. The use of the word pussy to discribe someone who is afeminite or cowardly is as absurd as using the word dick to discribe a jerk or an idiot. And yes Virginia the sex organs are MALE and/or FEMALE. Thank you for calling me a silly tart, that's a fun kinda girl to be. But I will have to beat you latter. Why is it that you and all your male comrades can get on board and rave their ravings, but when I do, everyone of you pussies gets your panties up in a scrunchy bunch? If I sing to cyndi lauper at a Karaoke bar wearing a velvet dress can I be a pussy too? Final thought.
I wrote these this am so I haven't had much time. I do plan on doing more of these if you have any helpful info or would like to post some of your own feel free
Lenore the Bore,.....obviously some one of your caliber never has to stoop so low as to wipe her own buttocks, or even clean up a dish. I'm sure others do that for you. Do they erase your negtative press for you also? The relationship between Lenore's literary ineptitude is inversely poportionate to the suckfactor of her poems.
FORMULA: (LLI)/(SF*X)=1
You may apply this to anyone of her insipid ramblings. I would post a critique, but you are beyond the reach of any muse. Not to mention, you would edit the poem inorder to rid yourself of my spot-on observations. Ta Ta
Shin-Bojangles: It doesn't matter whether elves are, "in fact", the most dangerous things on the face of the earth. Males with pointy ears who gallop around on horses and sing about Elbereth are pussies in my book. Think about it; if any human males did it in the actual world then they would undoubtedly be pussies (other things being equal). The world Ultimate Fighting champion would be a pussy if he wore a velvet dress on weekends and sang along to Cyndi Lauper in a karaoke bar. My point is that being a pussy can shine through even in the face of fighting ability. And I'm really, really, really, really sorry if someone objects to my use of the term "pussies", but it's a perfectly standard use of the word, and unless you can think of a better way to convey the idea then stop bitching. But aside from the fact that they're pussies, I don't think I'd be thinking anything about their elegantness or fierceness. The "contrast" of "elegant" and "fierce" is possibly one of the least interesting things ever. What is people's obsession with trite "constrasts"? I swear sometimes I think I'm going to explode. Powerful yet gentle. Innocent yet wicked. Elegant yet fierce. It's not that amazing. It's a common occurrence for something to have apparently-contrasting properties, especially in wish-fulfilment fiction (not that I'm saying LOTR is wish-fulfilment fiction. Just that a lot of people treat it that way). Why this is seen as so 'special' or 'magical' or 'beautiful' or 'wonderful' (not that you implied any of those things) is beyond me. I can of course see why it's appealing, and I think I can see why people become obsessed with things that incorporate particular kinds of contrasts, but "elegant yet fierce" is something straight out of a 14-year-old girl's diary, and for grown men and women to obsess over elves just because they're "elegant yet fierce" is insane. And, of course, they're fictional, which is another reason why it's so despicable. As for you, you silly tart god'swife: if you aren't another one of horus8's incredibly stimulating alter egos, allow me to explain something to you: I was well aware of the semantic tension between 'androgynous' and 'pussies'. I left it in because a) the use of the word 'pussies' is non-literal, b) the sex organs of the female are not themselves male or female, and c) I didn't think anyone would do anything so incredibly facile as point out the tension. My mistake.
Ahhhh. yes, so much more to the point now...i get that feeling alot, alot, alot...yes night eyed critters in the boonies, vacant, sordid, canopied penelopes.... a bug zapper rocking back and fourth exploding the occasional moth might be nice...regardless this piece is moody and sneaky and looming! 8/10
What's up? well this is an old poem guys so a lot of things have changed since then...well not a lot but some...loved getting the replies, they gave me one hell of a laugh lol...and jade thank you for your reply I would love to hear more from you and I like the poems that i've read from you so far.
But, "in all seriousness", any person has the right to kill themselves whenever they fucking want. There may be reasons why they "shouldn't" (like other obligations), but ceteris paribus there's no justification for forbidding killing yourself. You should be ashamed of yourself for trying to force people into your horrible, horrible, horrible, horrible, horrible religion, "jade".
Praise is fine and dandy, but when it comes from the likes of my favorite poets in this house - and there are really only 10 or so - I become oh so very tickled pink! Christof - thank you for the comparison(?) to one of my favorite poets, and for your concern that Venus could possibly be neglected. No man should neglect a goddess. Babbit - any feedback from you is appreciated, as you are most certainly a Poetry God. Thank you for your praise. Regarding the suggestion, I looked at again and found that I am much too attached to the ending to change it. Please try it again in a few days. wife god woman - thank you for summing it up nicely ;)
Oh, so now you two like each other? Zzin + His spouse; mucho mojo a la femme. But, in this piece, where is Freya? I could see extending this to cover a larger number of female deities.