Re: Spilling Out Sideways by PsydewaysTears	Dovina 69.175.6.101	1-Jan-05/1:49 PM
Understand the crooked maze. And not a bad use of words that rhyme with it.
Re: An Ode To An Angel by Bhaskaryya	jroday 204.215.33.104	1-Jan-05/3:11 AM
When the sun rises my angel, I shall be there with thee Never allowing thy soul to stray from me.Just a little something from my next poem. I really like this poem, keep up the good work -9-
Re: I walk with no road by kawakurdi	Dovina 69.175.6.101	1-Jan-05/1:35 PM
This could be said with 1/3 as many words and twice the impact.
regarding some deleted poem...	Sasha 69.138.240.116	1-Jan-05/11:23 AM
A thoughtful prayer. However, the whole "The lord is my shepherd" thing has been so done.
Re: Elopement by Sasha	Dovina 69.175.6.101	31-Dec-04/8:24 AM
Romantic! It's like Beach Villanelle, but better, a lot better. I must complain, however, about "magnified" because anything reflected from a person's eye is not magnified, but reduced in size as in a convex mirror. Overall very appealing.
Re: willitwork by FreeFormFixation	Dovina 69.175.6.101	31-Dec-04/8:32 AM
The first half implies some trick of writing you are planning, but I don't see it coming through. Quotes around the second half imply a note you left for her to find as if by accident. But the line about a charade doesn't work if that's true.
regarding some deleted poem...	Dan garcia-Black 66.218.59.79	31-Dec-04/8:37 AM
I can't help it. I'm a fan of fins. -10-
Re: Separation by MacFrantic	Dovina 69.175.6.101	31-Dec-04/8:56 AM
A comma after remonstrate would relieve some ambiguity. And conventional spacing would help. It's quite good, really, just hard to wade through at first.
Re: Below Tide by D. $ Fontera	Dovina 69.175.6.101	31-Dec-04/9:15 AM
Verse 2 is especially nice. It can happen anywhere.
Re: My Beliefs by jroday	Acid_moose 209.208.77.42	31-Dec-04/9:37 AM
thats great,i don't really know if it was a poem or not, but it had a lesson and it made you think a little so its good enough for me, 9
Re: My Wife by Dovina	Shuushin 64.222.177.181	31-Dec-04/10:24 AM
Well, I really thought you was a goil. Maybe you are doing a perspective thing (sometimes I pretend I'm human). I think you have to be a goil. So. As it is then. Having trouble finding its mission, and if I have then it was found by the end of the second stanza. Made me consider it though, without hesitation.
regarding some deleted poem...	Shuushin 64.222.177.181	31-Dec-04/10:27 AM
This is very aptly put : "And because that other fool". Nice one. Might want to consider loosing that third "together"?
regarding some deleted poem...	D. $ Fontera 205.188.116.67	31-Dec-04/10:32 AM
A painting if there ever was one. *10*
Re: An Ode To An Angel by Bhaskaryya	Bhaskaryya 61.0.144.107	31-Dec-04/8:38 PM
I wrote that waaaay back!! So please comment accordingly. I know it's not good!!
Re: Math Poem 3 by Dovina	jroday 204.215.33.104	1-Jan-05/1:13 AM
My students loves reading your math poems. I think Im going to let them write one for extra credit, since they keep asking me. Felicia
Re: An Ode To An Angel by Bhaskaryya	Dovina 69.175.6.101	1-Jan-05/1:42 PM
"strived for more than what was mine" Good line, and I say that because I have done that. "lucky few to have seen a miracle" Yes, and it's so easy to see afterward. Your explanitory notes at beginning and end only detract. The poem stands on its own.
Re: 38 Lines by auscot	Dovina 69.175.6.101	1-Jan-05/1:44 PM
So what? If you have writers block, just say so.
Re: No More Autumn Poems (Edit) by Sasha	Dovina 69.175.6.101	1-Jan-05/1:54 PM
After feeding the tree all summer, we put on this little show of color, then die. Long live Autumn! Good poem, but I want to be serenaded.
Re: Below Tide by D. $ Fontera	Shuushin 70.16.209.52	1-Jan-05/7:44 PM
A nice sentiment. Hard to make an emotional dent in an event of such scope.
Re: Math Poem 3 by Dovina	zodiac 212.118.11.30	1-Jan-05/10:20 PM
This is the best poem you've ever written. I'm serious.