| regarding some deleted poem... |
Dan garcia-Black 66.218.59.234 |
12-Sep-04/1:28 PM |
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
Dovina 24.52.157.176 |
12-Sep-04/9:29 AM |
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A disconnected flow that can only mean love. And maybe to polish it up for her would be a turn-off.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
Dovina 24.52.157.176 |
12-Sep-04/9:33 AM |
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You lose me on the last two lines. Before that I see a flood and a canal with a barge on it and wonder how a stonemason belongs here.
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| Re: Deep Sleep by Enchantres |
Dovina 24.52.157.176 |
12-Sep-04/9:35 AM |
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What a perfect way to die. Nice.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
LintyWeenis 205.188.117.13 |
12-Sep-04/1:31 PM |
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If the goal was to confuse your reader, then congratulations, you've done it. This could be about Ice-Cream or a person. Either way, things that confuse me are good because that means that someone has managed to write something that I can't understand. And I like to think I understand bunches of oats, so for that. -8-
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| Re: Daddy by LintyWeenis |
Prince of Void 217.218.131.146 |
12-Sep-04/1:32 PM |
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| Re: Daddy by LintyWeenis |
Dan garcia-Black 66.159.205.135 |
12-Sep-04/10:09 AM |
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Says it very well. -10-
The lack of a space after the period might be a device to create a sense of urgency. I'd like to see it used uniformly if that's what it's for. Anyway you look at it -10-.
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| Re: Down Drown by LintyWeenis |
Dan garcia-Black 66.159.205.135 |
12-Sep-04/10:17 AM |
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So many ways to interpret this. I can't help feeling it's a "mea cupla" in the christian sense of giving your screwed up life to god (If I didn't have this suspicion it would be a -10-.If it's about something real like a m/f relationship, it gets an extra point. For now -9-.
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| Re: chunks by FreeFormFixation |
Dan garcia-Black 66.159.205.135 |
12-Sep-04/10:25 AM |
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Don't know why I like it. Evocative?
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| Re: School 61 by unnesessary |
Dovina 24.52.157.176 |
12-Sep-04/12:18 PM |
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I should vote 1 in retaliation, butI rather like this.
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| Re: Grandpa's boat by Caducus |
LintyWeenis 205.188.117.13 |
12-Sep-04/1:33 PM |
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Ooh. This made me feel something. Good :)
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| Re: happiness prescribed by erickvisions |
LintyWeenis 205.188.117.13 |
12-Sep-04/1:10 PM |
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| Re: A Choice by Dovina |
Prince of Void 217.218.131.146 |
12-Sep-04/1:11 PM |
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now i understood why i loves your poems
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| Re: a goblet of divine wine brings me dreams by Prince of Void |
LintyWeenis 205.188.117.13 |
12-Sep-04/1:13 PM |
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sized or seized?
Either way. Good job.
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| Re: Litany by zodiac |
Prince of Void 217.218.131.146 |
12-Sep-04/1:17 PM |
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very good poem..i love this poem
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| Re: Daddy by LintyWeenis |
LintyWeenis 205.188.117.13 |
12-Sep-04/1:18 PM |
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Yea, I stopped putting spaces after he walked in the room on purpose. Good eye, Garcia :) About the drive-way thing, that was me being stupid in Typoville. But! Being that I also reside in Lazeonia, it will go unchanged. But thank you for bringing it to my attention.
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| Re: Grandpa's boat by Caducus |
Dan garcia-Black 66.218.59.234 |
12-Sep-04/1:24 PM |
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| Re: Down Drown by LintyWeenis |
LintyWeenis 205.188.117.13 |
12-Sep-04/1:26 PM |
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I wrote this about a friend of mine who we'll call "Jack". Jack and his girlfriend as so messed up and so I wrote this not exactly for him, but about him. Having screwy friends is inspiration in a hand basket.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
LintyWeenis 205.188.117.13 |
12-Sep-04/2:30 PM |
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This reminds me of a person I know's relationship. He should really read this.
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| regarding some deleted poem... |
Dovina 24.52.157.176 |
12-Sep-04/3:04 PM |
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Permanently? Eyes caress his coat. Sad.
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