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on the space between by impert&ent
25 Aug 2003, 5:54 PM
extremely satisfying. in a chop wood, carry water kind of way.
so, wait, let me get this straight--you buy into the whole who's who bullshit, and you criticize the ranker? the most advanced forum for literary comeraderie in the civilzed world???
HOW DARE YOU!!
BANISHED!!!
okay, well, tell me some of the somethings you did to get by. in detail. make it real. did you steal from your mom? blow strangers?
because this is boiled down. and sanitized. it hints at big bad things. you know, the way parents do when they tell you not to do something, and your first thought was, bull-shit.
specifics make a poem, joe.
if you're sleeping in your car for a while (that way they can't FIND your car), without a permanent address, and you're buying catfood instead of paying back your grandfather...
you see what i am saying?
make me believe you lived it.
this is more like crystal lane swift's pablum than anything real. god bless the girl for her innocence, and for her faith, but she cannot write a poem to save her life. she's too sugar-coated.
maybe i'm too jaded? i don't think so. show me someone who has not suffered. okay, maybe -=Dark_Angel=- hasn't. he's got it all.
I hate people who write sailing verse better than I. Grrr. I pray... I pray..... something nasty and including a great white whale. I think I've just poxed myself.lol
You have quelled my grumpiness for the day. Thank you.
LuckyJoe
replying on Playa been caught in their games. (revised/new) by LuckyJoe
25 Aug 2003, 4:28 PM
And how was any of this niggerish? You're comments never make any sense...
I'll agree that it needs work. But I don't agree that it sounds like something bob dole would write. I'm a recovering druggy I've been there I've done and felt the stuff in this poem. Do you know what it feels like wanting to quit and not being able to...keep saying you're going to and everyday again you're doing something to get by. Get excited for weeks and sit around in a trance without a thought in your head.
What made me decide it was time to give everything up was when I had a breakdown... I wake shaking out of control, my heart racing a million beats a minute.
Everyone has an idea of what drugs do... but they don't have a real clue until they've had to start start at zero and below and rebuild their life because of how deep into them they were. It took near death for me to finally see the light.
Free Verse.. Poetry doesnt need to rhyme shitface.
nice copyright.
Don-Quixote
replying on POEMRANKER HAT - WHERES MY FREE MUG BITCH? by Don-Quixote
25 Aug 2003, 3:48 PM
ner ner ner ;P
Better than copyrighting shit rants like this.
I don't do pap smears. That's the other Jeremi.
Jeremi B. Handrinos
on POEMRANKER HAT - WHERES MY FREE MUG BITCH? by Don-Quixote
25 Aug 2003, 1:56 PM
Damn, I was just about to do one of these called "alms for the armless".
joe.
if you have been there, you should write about what happened. because this looks like bob dole wrote it.
you should subtitle this 'refer madness : the reprise' or 'drugs are bad, mmkay?'
no truth to it, and therefor, no vote.
Man.. you need to look this over.. really.. because it looks like a chinese peasant with english as a second language wrote this.
Plus, have you actually done drugs?..
lmao.
ah, thanks for pointing out the use of ember twice, and yeah, it does glow like an ember.. atleast to me.. im wierd. heh.
bad metaphors? ... what metaphors?.. hrmm? rilke, dont speak when you dont know exactly what yer yappin bout.
But not your face, i jeered to the left and hit my trash cans.
You are incredibly to nigger for me.
Veins VEINS! you fucking idiot.