razorgrin
on Soap Star Stud Haikus by <{Baba^Yaga}>
9 Dec 2002, 12:25 PM
rockin' my socks.
Suicide Typo, is an affective play, you are a very good writer.
Thanks Bill, I think I'll change "pestiferous", that never really sat well with me anyway.
What did you change? It sounds cleaner each time, but the last edit must of been very mininimal.
mad skillz. truly. rock forth good sir, and keep making my days a little better. The ebst way to ensure dream memorization is to mentally repeat "i will remember my dreams" as you fall asleep. When you wake up, lie still and try to remember as many details as you can before you try to get up and write it down. at least so claim all my books on the psychology of dreaming.
Carries the image of sad contentment with dignity, I don't find dogs in poems very often, loyal creatures.
very nice.
you were laughing while it was going on just as much as i was.
so, say it. who gives a fuck if it's arcane? if it's your vernacular (and it's mine) use it. i'm not one to kowtow to the "ugh-i-have-toget-my-dictionary-AGAIN" crowd. i don't throw too many curves, and the ones i do throw go mostly unnoticed, methinks. (yes, i do use that word in common speech. ask my friends.) so, make it 'morn' if that's what sounds right.
and, by the way, the scrap of paper bit at the beginning is spot on. do you know about the large-muscle-movement/brain chemistry changes that occur when brain function shifts? and that the chemical released by the muscles trigger it?
coming from you, this is high praise indeed. now i really AM blushing!
But i still want to say "morn" instead of "morning". It just sounds better to my ear... Hrmm...
shit! it looks like i directed this at you, zzin, when it was really a response to some asshole whose comment has been deleted. just so you know.
this is beautiful. i wasn't sure about the buttercup line, but, by god, it cinches it. you have skills. mad skills.
hearty.
nifty poem. nice image, at the end there. i'd change the name though. maybe "panning for dildos"? 8 swastikas!
...and i thank you. I wasn't sure about this one...
that's it, take a stand against both sides! now you're getting somewhere. 4 swastikas!
Despite your high-falutin' words, I like it. Yup. I read it aloud and it sounds good to me. Or do I just love my own voice? Who knows.
So olympian, I admire. Now I go back to the cthonic.
maybe it was false teeth, slipping the cogs.
apparently, whether you voted or not does not matter. bully for you for giving it the old democratic try, thopugh...