replying on Wreck of the Poor Anchor by Dovina
21 Jan 2007, 3:19 AM
It was a typo; the angel meant to say 'you foil', as in, you foil the deep space radio station's research by covering poemeranker with foil. Time Team 3000 will be tearing their hair out over this.
replying on Wreck of the Poor Anchor by Dovina
21 Jan 2007, 3:16 AM
*well the road runs down by the butternut grove to old Bill Skinner's stream...*
on Molecules of Paint by Dovina
21 Jan 2007, 3:13 AM
This is pretty good actually. The images are well-crafted and effective. It needs a more careful second read though. I'll come back later. Metrically, I like it mostly, although some places need reworking ('crimson/Artistes' etc.). rockmage might have a point about there being too many words though, ones like 'while', 'now', 'then' can probably be edited out or replaced.
'spec' = 'speck'?
'resignly' = 'resignedly'?
Love the final stanza :-)
'spec' = 'speck'?
'resignly' = 'resignedly'?
Love the final stanza :-)
replying on Stripping the willow by ecargo
18 Jan 2007, 2:21 PM
I might have gotten carried away by the title a little. But still, it's a wonderful line.
on He's... by holliebollie_19
18 Jan 2007, 9:05 AM
Couple of typos in here need fixing.
Influences?
Influences?
replying on Stripping the willow by ecargo
18 Jan 2007, 9:02 AM
Nothing whatsoever wrong with British spelling, it shows excellent taste ;-)
on Stripping the willow by ecargo
18 Jan 2007, 9:00 AM
POEME STATS:
Stanzas: 3
Lines: 12
Uses of 'the': 7
Uses of 'a': 4
Not that I'm criticising there, but you might want to borrow one of the mage's chisels?
'along the long' = yikes
'a sough of doubt' = sex on a light blue screen
Stanza two is super, so is the final line. Stanza one feels weaker than the rest, not that I know what to suggest. Maybe it's the brevity of line one. Everyone who says this is a lovely poem is right though.
Stanzas: 3
Lines: 12
Uses of 'the': 7
Uses of 'a': 4
Not that I'm criticising there, but you might want to borrow one of the mage's chisels?
'along the long' = yikes
'a sough of doubt' = sex on a light blue screen
Stanza two is super, so is the final line. Stanza one feels weaker than the rest, not that I know what to suggest. Maybe it's the brevity of line one. Everyone who says this is a lovely poem is right though.
on Give it up Max by Stephen Robins
18 Jan 2007, 8:51 AM
Top closing stanza.
I have a David Gower-based poem in production for you.
I have a David Gower-based poem in production for you.
replying on Wreck of the Poor Anchor by Dovina
16 Jan 2007, 2:32 PM
This ain't ego-talk. I was just trying to cover up the fact that I had nothing useful to say :(
'It' being the word or the poem? If you mean the poem, then it's nothing more than it says; the narrator having a really bad day. If it's the word 'degree', I can't remember my precise thinking (at least, not this late and after a long day) but it'll have been along the lines of 'in her own way' or 'in her own manner'. Or something like that. A poetic way of saying 'whatever', really.
on Wreck of the Poor Anchor by Dovina
16 Jan 2007, 2:17 PM
I quite liked some of it but then as Stephen will tell you, I'm incapable of disliking anything, and as rockmage will tell you I have no talent, so it's a pretty pointless compliment.
replying on Same old rancour (a yellow stream of consciousness) by ecargo
16 Jan 2007, 2:11 PM
I'm back in England until the end of the week (working again over the Christmas break) but I should be in Cardiff in April. Lots of friends to visit as well, so I expect to be much more well-travelled by July. Uni's going really well and I finally have some direction career-wise (hurrah!). It just requires the year to finish as it started and for the teachers' union to not bring about armageddon. Let me know when you're about again, we'll chat then :-)
on Same old rancour (a yellow stream of consciousness) by ecargo
16 Jan 2007, 1:52 PM
Hey there ecargo, I wasn't going to sign back to poemeranker but I saw you about and thought I'd say the hellos. Long time no speak, how's the kayaking?
replying on Russian absinthe by AlexandraLeaving
5 Jan 2007, 3:35 AM
It's true. I even like that comment. I was born with a terrible disability that meant I couldn't dislike anything, and have had to go through life wearing a faintly puzzled smile. It's a bit like being Borat, only without the sock visibility.
Did you know that in 2041 we're all going to be wiped out by an enormous asteroid unless NASA can get Bruce Willis out of retirement to open up an Armageddon-style can of whupass on the situation? No more poemranker, no more cancelled flights from Heathrow, no more David Gower. What will the place be like then?
Did you know that in 2041 we're all going to be wiped out by an enormous asteroid unless NASA can get Bruce Willis out of retirement to open up an Armageddon-style can of whupass on the situation? No more poemranker, no more cancelled flights from Heathrow, no more David Gower. What will the place be like then?
Love the last stanza and like the idea within 'greenly', although I hate the word itself. 'Factuality' really doesn't sit well as a line end, 'fact' would do just as well for me.
Too many uses of 'he'; maybe you're trying to show his idealistic egocentrism, but it sits awkwardly with me. Still effective though.
Happy New Year :-)
Too many uses of 'he'; maybe you're trying to show his idealistic egocentrism, but it sits awkwardly with me. Still effective though.
Happy New Year :-)
on Russian absinthe by AlexandraLeaving
2 Jan 2007, 1:26 AM
I quite like this and I don't know why.
on Happy birthday to myself by Prince of Void
2 Jan 2007, 1:17 AM
Happy birthday indeed
I missed the second part of the Christmas VoD. Was it good?
* not even a poeme. How's that for being slapped with harsh criticism?