I just worked that one out, right this second ;-)

Oh, it's the pause. Gotcha.

Excuse me, I'm off to feed some orphans.

SUGGESTION: Winning = control of Middle Eastern oil supplies = the ability to tell Russia where to stick it when they cut off our resources.

Oh Christ, I think I just broke out in pimples.

I've said many times: the solution is to send all our football hooligans over to Muslimland with a few crates of Stella and a brick each. Two birds with one stone.

It's the caps and oversized socks which strike the fatal blow. When compared with a gleaming set of whites, and a hat with a brim wide enough to shade the pavillion, well, there can be no such comparison.

The question is, though, was two hours long enough to finish a kingsized Coke and an imperial-galactic-overlord sized tub of popcorn?

It's all about Bill Bailey, really.

Come on, it's an American sport. How could you possibly pick up your two million dollars if you don't get a freebie move?

Are there actually any rules to baseball, or is it just rounders played on steroids?

To be fair, I only watched it because I was massively ill and couldn't do anything else. TV time is usually only for Match of the Day and Never Mind the Buzzcocks, which has gone downhill rapidly since arsehole Amstall took over. Bring back Lamarr.

You know, I don't think I ever talked to VioletSuede. Was she really like that?

I'd submit it but 99% of the poemeranker users aren't qualified to read its content, and I fear getting comments about baseball.

You might get away with 'spec', if the reader's in a perceptive mood. 'Resignly' has to be changed though, in my opinion.

'Crimson' ends with a weak syllable, and I pronounce 'Artistes' with 'Ar-' being also a weak syllable. That being said, I think you lot over in America might do it differently. So yes, you can get away with that too, I expect.

Here's your Christmas present:

Dream Gower (sonnet) by Ranger

Shall I compare thee to a morning's play?
When England open first on Lords' fine ground
And Aussies o'er the world watch in dismay
As fifties! hundreds! double tons abound
With front foot forward - front knee bent, the click
Of willow meeting leather brings a cheer
Then when the ball's pitched short, a subtle flick
Shall bring four more! The bound'ry swiftly cleared
In graceful flight. But thou art just a dream
O noble dream! To make me ever yearn
For cover drives borne from the spinning seam
And hair as white as hats which stop sun's burn
But Test match scores shall never run this way
Now glory's over. English sport is gay