on some deleted poem
13 Oct 2003, 5:36 PM
Such a simple poem for such a complicated thing. I'm not sure I like that.
on гоÑÑдаÑÑÑва by Wobble McFly
14 Oct 2003, 4:21 AM
The nuance of ryhme, etc. are lost on me here, but the theme - a declaration of rights, of sorts, has merit.
Admittedly, the cyrilic is interesting.
Admittedly, the cyrilic is interesting.
on some deleted poem
14 Oct 2003, 6:36 PM
Quite a nice natural flow. And a nice use of the language, many nice images.
on Birdcalls by poetandknowit
14 Oct 2003, 6:58 PM
Quite lovely.
I will say the first line made me immediately think of langston hughes - just that, and nothing else.
excellent.
I will say the first line made me immediately think of langston hughes - just that, and nothing else.
excellent.
on Turncoat by poetandknowit
14 Oct 2003, 7:01 PM
Such flowing words - though I don't completely understand it.
The touch of rhyme in the middle is used to good effect.
The touch of rhyme in the middle is used to good effect.
on Tsunami Love by The_Third_Isis
14 Oct 2003, 7:04 PM
"I spin rinse and tumble deeper into your realm."
nice.
something missing in the last line, I think.
nice.
something missing in the last line, I think.
on The Bread O' Heaven by ?-Dave_Mysterious-?
14 Oct 2003, 7:09 PM
a prosish (tm) seven, were it an actual sonnet, I would give you and 8.
on some deleted poem
14 Oct 2003, 7:12 PM
cute. Meaningless outside of this place, the place of the purple pill.
skillfully rhymed (well, hell, you made up half the words).
skillfully rhymed (well, hell, you made up half the words).
on some deleted poem
14 Oct 2003, 7:15 PM
no idea. but i like the horse collapsing imagery.
on Love a Duck by fuzzylogicisagimp
14 Oct 2003, 7:19 PM
There's never a videocamera around when needed, is there?
Aflack my ass.
Aflack my ass.
on The spinning infirmary by INTRANSIT
14 Oct 2003, 7:22 PM
awesome title. Toss a questionmark into the text and call it done.
I like.
I like.
on @}:- Everyday I send you a rose by Prince of Void
14 Oct 2003, 7:30 PM
this is about a rose, right?
"droprain" is a cool word. actually there is an interesting slant to the language here (and a few spelling errors).
I'm guessing you could convey the same meaning and emotion in about a sixth the words.
"droprain" is a cool word. actually there is an interesting slant to the language here (and a few spelling errors).
I'm guessing you could convey the same meaning and emotion in about a sixth the words.
on Battle of the brains by INTRANSIT
14 Oct 2003, 7:34 PM
it is amazing how many meanings "render" has.
I've seen you do alot with alot, and now - alot with a few. cool.
This should have a few stanza buddies, I think.
I've seen you do alot with alot, and now - alot with a few. cool.
This should have a few stanza buddies, I think.
on Facing Goodbye by Caducus
14 Oct 2003, 7:37 PM
Quite a nice first stanza there.
Perhaps I'm a bit jaded, but some of the rhymes in the remaining stanza brought me pause.
I'm thinking you could consolidate the second and third to arrive at something that compares with the first.
Perhaps I'm a bit jaded, but some of the rhymes in the remaining stanza brought me pause.
I'm thinking you could consolidate the second and third to arrive at something that compares with the first.
on sevenfourteenrobinson by FreeFormFixation
14 Oct 2003, 7:39 PM
"I see dead poems"
what did they whisper, what did they whisper??
what did they whisper, what did they whisper??
on salt and celibacy by calliope
14 Oct 2003, 7:43 PM
I'm liking the title, and many of the individual lines. As for the thing-in-itself, I will nod knowingly, and select six from the dropdown menu at right.
on some deleted poem
15 Oct 2003, 7:45 AM
hard to avoid the need for synthesis, isn't it?
I like this, it strikes a chord.
I like this, it strikes a chord.
on some deleted poem
15 Oct 2003, 7:52 AM
It has a Dr. Suess air about it, only without the cleverness.
on some deleted poem
15 Oct 2003, 7:58 AM
note to self: don't make the title of the piece be the only line that falls flat.
make "a poisonous mushroom" be "poisonous mushrooms" and it will flow better, imo.
make "a poisonous mushroom" be "poisonous mushrooms" and it will flow better, imo.