Within a dang... Is that like 'don't give a dang (slang for damn)? Even if it is a typo, this just does not do it for me. I am clearly not smart enough for the last line.

Nice! Flows really well, is entertaining - the timing of the ending is perfect. a small nit: dumpt the "that" after "shit" and the "the" after "to" as in "Not the shit they sell to tourists."

Pretty awesome, really. should be "heart[']s" I think tho. None of the rhyming seems forced, which is cool. If you are so moved, maybe you could consider replacing the second "the 3 words" with "them"? It might just be me, but I felt distracted by the duplication (as if I was missing something, thinking "it must be so for a reason").

sexy

great

Can't really hear it as a lyric, nevertheless nice wordplay, and poetic language with something more concrete

how sweet, life is shit she makes it (a bit) better somehow chillingly reminiscent the rhyme with sheep is a bit daft though

shades of john k, a fine parody possibly should not have to tell the reader it is a parody

Don't know what a Jonquil is.

Good capture "i feel old..."

ah. yes. wait, let me read it again ah. and again. yes. another incredible piece from one of the best.

Lai

A tipper.

and apple peels hang noses... I an't help but laugh. Nice image.

Some lovely images here including the kitten bit (confusing though with drowning and kite string - maybe just the effects of the rye and ergot fungus?) at the start, can you do something with "sun falls down" - where else might it fall? Up? "frost blow-touch" is noteable; nice. I'm not going to pretend to understand about a quarter of it, but it has a nice flow nonetheless, so I'll just go along for the ride.

Memorable: "My laughter forgets happiness And my drinking remembers thirst"

It is neat how it reads louder and louder as one gets further down the poem. I do think the knob could be turned a bit faster though. You might accomplish this by either trimming the extra words, "to his anger" to "it", for example and restructuring the line breaks (okay, that might be deconstructive criticsm... maybe it's REconstructive...) The ending has a nice snap to it.

So, am I wrong about this - we only get three entries a week, right? If I were to give you 3 dollars, would you eat one - or, if say I were to give you 3 apples... wait - get your own damn apples.

Although this may be true for these flowers, and I don't mean to be insulting, because they are likely near and dear to your heart, but I'm having trouble seeing/hearing the bigger picture. Not getting the "ahhh, most exerrent..." moment; how it rings true for me. And ah, what the hell, I sound like a prick already - it could do without the alliteration.

Hey - this rocks. How you used such small and simple words to such great effect is, literally, beyond me. Ten; my first since I got here.