absurd. an "8" worth of absurdity.

I love you! Bend over now.

oh man, that's funny. 8

Replace all instances of "blood" with Kim-Chee.

I still have yet to find a superior.

Drats! I do believe my speed reading from high school has become malignant.

Very nice. 9/10. I especially enjoyed the inappropriate use of "an".

Work on your wording. Use more powerful words. Your idea is good but the presentation isn't.

Much better than your other one. Way too many uses of And. Try to re-write and eliminate the And. Also shorten the first 5 lines and let the reader come up with the scenerio.

This is the definition of a strong-worded poem.

So you want to be a raisin? What are you breathing in? Describe. The poem does not work for me, sorry. It captures nothing and is about nothing.

methamphetamines burn holes in your brain. I've heard.

damn, a lurv pome that I like. Time for bed. 8

mmm, delicious! Like soft Belgian white chocolate dribbled over a hard slab of Schwarze Herren Schokolade.

concophony oughtta be a word. I vote we include it in english. alls left is to choose a meaning. Google lists it 26 times, used variously to mean "confusion" "overwhelming array of discordant sounds" "cornucopia(!)" "pastiche" and "fusion" I think it should just mean any short, intense burst of sharp sounds, as in "there was a flurry of arms and a concophony of flesh striking flesh and then one man stood, confident and dusty and victorious, and the other lay defeated and blooded."

Here's my version!! I hope you like it!! Once I had a love and it was a gas Soon turned out had a heart of glass Seemed like the real thing, only to find Mucho mistrust, love's gone behind Once I had a love and it was divine Soon found out I was losing my mind It seemed like the real thing but I was so blind Mucho mistrust, love's gone behind In between What I find is pleasing and I'm feeling fine Love is so confusing there's no peace of mind If I fear I'm losing you it's just no good You teasing like you do

lean and dark and good. Thanks! 9

Why doesn't the first letter of each sentence start with a capital letter? I thought that was proper English?

I re-read it and I liked it much better the second time around. It's amazing how much you miss by reading things once. Here's a 9. By the way, my father also had a mistress so I can identify. Every summer we would go to the beach together as mom stayed at home. She made my dad happy so he treated my mom even better. I do not necessarily thing that it is a bad thing to have one as long as you can manage to keep everyone happy.

Profound!! Genius!! Sure it is. Look up the haiku!!