I'm doing my best not to be you. God spare me from that fate.

No insulting McCain! He lived a bare hour's away from here and is one of the prides of the province, by Gad. By the way, this isn't TO the chip. It's BY the chip. Change the title to 'The Unwanted Chip's Ode' or something like that.

'Eye pinch'? God that would hurt.

this was a fun ride.

Ah. Much much better. Except the end, I rather liked the lines breaks at 'Wait.../It was not etc'. And I'd liek it better either if you put 'of every dagger' on a separate line or got rid of the trees. But still, far better. The replacement of the 'Fuck' with the 'goodnight kiss' is good.

Not bad my philosophical stain

.... .... .... .... A true mindfucker of a poem, i want to read it again after reflection and maybe re-vote, watch this space i may have questions. wheres the paracetomol

There's a lot of wonderful language here I especially like "The derilict peace" that images I think is an important one, for me anyway. "Ensuring life and not existence" makes me say 'fuck'... but in a good way. Unfortunately my less favorite rhyme(love/above) is also found here. When ever I see the word above at the end of a line I know the word love is not far behind. Ha, I made a poe-m!

This poem is somewhat stale. Ha ha, I'm funny. It made me smile so that's a good thing. it reminds if of how children feel sorry for inanimate objects. I used to sit on the wobbly chair at home because I knew no one else liked it and I didn't want it to fell left out. My son does the same thing with his toys, well he used to. He doesn't play with toys anymore(sigh). I think children would appreciate this effort.

i wish you could post a link to this, with the music. then i could vote on it. it needs to be sung.

What do you feel on paper? Spores? Chip grease? Old semen?

Get rid of the last line. Please.

Unless you want vicious perverts of my sort to mock you into an early grave, spell 'ahead' correctly in the last line.

Did you drag this title out of you diaries in honor of Anne Sexton? Ugh! Although the poem is moving along it could still use tightening, but it is much better than the draft yesterday.

I especially liked the third stanza... the body knowing how to dance. Interesting it's the body doing the 'knowing'. I liked this

I can't help it. Generally, when I see the word 'Crocodile' in a poem, I expect to be amused. You actually managed to use them well. Bravo.

I've never had sex before. What's it like??? Wait... did I just say that? Or think it? Did THEY hear me? DO THEY KNOW MY... NOOOOOO!

my ribs swayed

if i were Dannara, i wouldn't know how the hell to take this (not that i do anyway).

oh, lord.