Phaiyne
on Lufituaeb by Phaiyne
20 Oct 2004, 6:43 PM
Love yourself
No, you can send it to the email listed on my Poemranker homepage.
I'll answer your question when you finally tell us what that word means.
It's not a riddle really. Have you ever tried to love a factso, instructable, working fool.
Your just to Blobby Arnt you.
I just wanted to make them Blobby.
ps. did you get my blobby e/mail
It's a riddle. Are you a librarian?
You have an impressive resume and vocabulary, Johnny. I suppose that I do appear self-righteous to hypocrites. Anyway, I'm bored by all this blah, blah, blah. Write an article about another lame poet's hair follicles that will be suitable for publication in some "highly respected lit mag." I'll just continue to post here with my opinion of your unimportance and lack of integrity intact.
Dan garcia-Black
Don't be so self-righteous. Everyone knows your true identity. It's Dan Garcia-Black, with a capital G. Why you still bother with this charade, hiding yourself behind an undercapitalised pseudonym is beyond me, though maybe it has something to do with being unable to "hack" even a reasonable conversation, to say nothing of poetry-writing or hiding your somewhat ill-informed and offensive notions on almost any subject.
No, wait. I suppose the appropriate thing to say here is: No, wait. I'm not hiding! To prove it I'll meet you on Santa Monica Pier at high noon - I'll be the one smoking two cigars. I'm registered at the Long Beach Motel Six under the pseudonym "Up Johndike".
Get over yourself. Of course we're all hacks here. Why the hell would anyone else hang out in this dump? The only difference between us is that I have two articles - one on Emily Dickinson fascicles and one on the rhythmickal and syntacktickal structures in oral/street/performance poetry - currently being vetted by respectable lit journals, which of course doesn't mean anything except that I happen to be good at at least one of my jobs, while you're not even a very good shoeshine. Also, you think I looked all these words up in a thesaurus and care whether or not people look things up in thesauri, though I didn't and don't. And I'm not gay but you are.
The "Islam/Western Pragmatism war" is just great, by the way. PS-I teach Adult Islam Retards, not children. PPS-Whatever.
Wrong and bland
such a terrible curse.
I suppose, in addition,
I have told and not shown.
No, no. It's wrong, but it's bland too.
I wonder why you break rhythm in the last three lines.
I weep with joy
for Christ has conquered
As a tree delivered
Him to hades
now a tree releases
me from bondage
Just a thought.
Thanks for your thoughts, I'm sure you thought 'quick' hard about this. "Token" is quite literally what we were doing in the back streets. Trust me 'speed of light' sounds a lot better than "going a hundred fifty two, not stopping for the lights red and blue", and the repetition is a reflexion(kinda of ties the title down).
<3 Jason
This is a disastrous attempt at poetry. It is among the worst I have ever read. The subject couldn't be less original, and the way you have written about it is utterly unremarkable. Your work is completely devoid of alliteration, simile, reification or any such literary devices. It is devoid of rhyme, devoid of imagery, and devoid of punctuation. The language used is whoppingly dull, and the overriding impression it gives is one of unbelievable mindlessness. The arbitrary line breaks and use of repetition are the only things that separate this bulgingly stupid dumpling from a blob of prose. Congratulations! -10-
A short story with too many "then"s and commas, Not a poem.
"often crazy in the head" about sums it up.
Nursery rhyme madness. Why? They are mad enough as is.
Quite good, especially, "the victim of lies became what he despised." I would omit the last 3 lines.
The daughter is her daughter's child. On it goes. Well done.