jroday
on Mississippi Burnin. by SupremeDreamer
10 Aug 2004, 5:06 AM
What is the concept behind this poem? before i make any
comment.
like you think your poem is the best? there are a lot of poems in here that people write that are way better than yours or mine put together. i just write cause i like to, it may not make sense to you but it makes sense to me and thats all that matters. i never said that i'm a real poet or that mine are any good, but your not any better. look at the language you use in your writing. your not even worth voting on.
"being ate"? You push those verb conjugations far enough and they'll scream at ya.
Rambling, and the ending is just plain cheesy. Plus, the rhyming is so rigid that there's no room for the rhythm to get off, but it still does.
Sorry.
Bitter resignment. I only take slight issue with the isolation/cages metaphor. It's a little too overused.
Thought about starting a new stanza at "familiar smells"?
who is this poem about?
The title doesn't exactly invite one to read on, but once through the door, it's not bad going unless you're squeamish.
Well written! The metaphors bouncing back and forth are really powerful.
Excellent Poem, captures lots of emotion in a seemingly harmless context. Well done.
just askin cause I live in Queens
Much too many questions this raises.
*10.5*
Wonderfully put, and I think that repeating "cold and black was perfect. *9*
Loved this line: "The brother who breathes the color red from the gold filled barn to the American flag."
Very nice!
I prefer carrots to karats, morfs to forms and v8 to vodka (for now).
I bet it's a rubbish song. I bet your friend is rubbish.
I have a friend whose best song is about song writer's block. She's had some of her songs recorded by a large entertainment corporation. When I asked her why her best song wasn't used, she said, 'It's an insider song. It doesn't appeal to people who listen to songs. The corp. felt it would appeal only to those who write songs." They were right. I love the song and your poem but it has a limited audience-- poets.
dear "my name means some really cool, REALLY!!!!!",
Look I understand what you are saying, but you slighted me (and quite a few others) on other pages, so guess what I know that your girlfriend has low self-esteem and allows you to take out your underemployed, loser, angry status out on her and writes it off as "you are creative," but you slight me I slight you, don't get your panties in a bunch...I guess I'm dim, but I don't get why a person who is as smart and as clever as you would respond to anyone who says something thats even remotely insultive, I thought that was something only dim people did.
Look you have some issues, all you do is go to people's page and talk crap and bring in your twisted perspective that's getting very tired, "your dim, your dim, your dim" what are you FIVE? I guess because that guy hurt your feelings on your page and now you want to get the universe back, but get over it, it's done.
You need some kind of release, go look at some porn.
And why don't you write a poem, you haven't posted anything in ages what are you sad or are you just a coward that uses one name to insult and one name to write?
You are dim. Continue with your music and stop this silly bs.
A meow and two licks to you,
cat
Stephen Robins
replying on Mr. Stryker, Do You Really Want Some Kind of War? by cat
9 Aug 2004, 8:05 AM
He's just gutted he did not think of it first and use it in one of his rants by shrouding it with guff and jodphurs.
'Inveterate' seems a fine word choice. What's wrong with it?
-=Dark_Angel=-, P.I.
replying on Mr. Stryker, Do You Really Want Some Kind of War? by cat
9 Aug 2004, 6:02 AM
Dunce. You post a comment listing the COMPLEATE LIST OF BUNCOMBE DODGES on someone's poeme, in reply to one of their comments, and then get all uppity when, surprise, surprise, they think you were talking about them. For pity's sake zodiac, how dare you? If someone replies to your comment, by default they are talking to you, and are posting their thoughts there for a specific reason. How dare you have the gall to suggest that cat has an inflated notion of self-importance, or whatever, just because she thought you were staining her jodhpurs?
P.S. "INVETERATE" is the mark of a top-notch dullard.