zodiac
on Sex Mob by nothingtoanyone
1 Jun 2004, 8:15 AM
Are you dyslexic?
There once was a chap called Simon,
Who pranced around like Bill Wyman,
But Bill he was not,
The closest he got,
Was splitting Mandy Smith's Hyman.
"In 1992, desperate to display its pro-business credentials, Labour launched the 'prawn cocktail offensive' to win hearts and minds in the City.
That old Tory warhorse Michael Heseltine realised it was doomed to failure.
'All those prawn cocktails for nothing,' he sneered. 'Never have so many crustaceans died in vain.'"
-The Wolverhampton Express & Star
I looked at my backside in the mirror: it was covered in prawns. When that happens you know it's time to put down the pogo stick and get the fuck out of Shrimpsville.
I'm Dick Bumston, P.I.
It's not an "inside joke". It's an extremely common, obvious and tedious piece of wordplay.
This sounds very much like... DAVE AIDS.
http://www.poemranker.com/poem-details.j
Title's all wrong. Should be called
'Ode To My Dildo On Loan'
i like the mystique
you have alot of potential
beautiful
like the descriptions
sometimes a bit over the top though
i don't like it
it's pretty cliche
refreshing
i like your style
i know how you feel and what you are trying to put out there - but your lyric has the predictability of any high school band. keep writing though - you have potential.
<3
emm
is this a joke?
i can only assume you are shooting to make the 20 worst board with this one, so -1-
has everything a good limerick should have... lewdness, humor, and fucked up bel-air, mid-air rhyme...and it opens up with the conventional "there once was a man from.." perfect
i work in the music industry, and as far as a lyric goes this would be extremely difficult to put to music. as a regular free verse poem i'd give this a 9, but as a lyric i have to drop to an 8. very good imagery, by the way
villanelles are tough poems to keep fresh from stanza to stanza with all the line repetition... very well done, solid on the form and vivid in content.
"they, in horror, looked on" breaks the flow of a limerick, and i agree that the last line is weak. take out the commas from the horror line and that part is fixed... the rest is up to you